Mrs Fox Heinous Revenge: Can You Love A Villainess like Me?
Chapter 155: The Two Boys

Chapter 155: The Two Boys

AiLin wasn’t sure how much have the psychiatrist had heard about her but she should have had a bit of a background about her healthcare and documents. She fiddled with her fingers, nervousness bubbling up her throat. No matter how many appointments she had made with psychiatrist, she still feels a sudden loom of dread around her neck whenever she entered the room.

"As a child," said Dr. Mei. Her tone wasn’t aggressive, it was gentle but straight to the point, something that was more comfortable to AiLin as she hated having to read between the lines when people talk to her. "Were you told to never express your own emotions?"

AiLin blinked and she shook her head, "Rather than told not to, they simply never asked about my emotions."

Dr. Mei nodded, "Can I assume your parent’s relationship aren’t too great toward each other?"

As expected, it was obvious, thought AiLin as she confirmed it with another nod of her head, "My father suspect that my mother had an affair behind him."

"I see, that tends to happen in marriages but there should be a reason for his doubts, have you ever ventured about it?" Dr. Mei asked as AiLin fell into a deep thought in her head.

Did Mr Jiang noticed Mrs Jiang’s affair before?

Now that she thought about it, something was odd. Back when Mrs Jiang was accused by all of the Jiang Family members, never once did Mr Jiang denied the accusation or protected his own wife from the accusation and gossips that spilled from his own family. It was as if deep down he also doubted that his own children is his.

"I’m not sure," whispered AiLin but seeing her expression Dr. Mei could see that she doubted her mother’s innocence which meant deep down AiLin knew of the affair but didn’t have the evidence to confirm it.

"Do you have any other words that you want to say when you think about your childhood?" Dr. Mei inquired.

Perhaps because of the soft fragrance or the sound of raindrops that echoed from the nearby window but everything was so peaceful that Ailin felt her body loosening and her muscles losing its tension. Only when it happened did she realize how tensed she had always been all this time. She realized that she had always had her body on guard as if in fear for danger that would come to rush toward her. Only now did she understood that she had been pushing herself so much so to the point that her body turned so fragile.

"I.." she whispered. About her childhood? "It was once a great childhood."

When she closed her eyes she recalled before her middle school how loving her mother and father was. Back then their marriage wasn’t utterly perfect but she was never subjected to abuse whether physical, mental, or verbal. Her brother, Jiang MengYao wasn’t such a sadistic pervert but a concerned older brother who would always prioritize her first.

Wait... did that actually happen?

"I think it was a great childhood?" AiLin muttered as she felt a tug in her own eyebrows upon her words. "I always celebrated my birthday with a cake... or did I had a cake?" She suddenly sounded lost and Dr Mei could tell that AiLin couldn’t even remember her own childhood due to how terrible the abuse had gone through in her life. She wasn’t even certain anymore if she once had a great childhood. As if a part of her told her that she did while the other part refused the idea.

"I don’t remember. I had always thought that it was better than when I reached my middle school years. My mother had turned abrasive and more violent. I think it’s because... right, because our grandmother had came rushing to the house one day and told my father that she saw my mother with another man that afternoon. There wasn’t any proof and my mother claimed she was always with me that day."

"What did you answer when your grandmother asked about the truth?" Dr. Mei’s voice entered her ears but she felt as if she was in half asleep state, her words simply came out of her mouth without her will, as if it was something she had wanted to spill for so long but never had anyone to hear to it until now.b

AiLin recalled everything clearly. The day when Mrs Jiang changed happened all of a sudden. That late in the nights, AiLin had answered to her grandmother innocently, "Mommy was in the room all day, I didn’t see her because her doors were locked and no matter how much I knock she didn’t come out. But then I saw her entering the house from the garden hehehe, I think mommy left to the garden early in the morning and we didn’t cross paths."

It was an innocent’s child answer. A child who was taught not to lie didn’t want to lie to her grandmother. AiLin had really waited for her mother in front of her room, not knowing it was empty she kept knocking on the door in hope for her mother to come out of the room to no avail. She then found her mother but not in the room. Mrs Jiang had re-entered the house from the garden so no one could find her after her little rendezvous.

AiLin’s eyes snapped open as she stared at the wooden ceiling of the room. She was startled by what she had just recalled and pushed herself to sit upward toward Dr. Mei, "How could I have forgotten about it?"

Dr Mei looked at her eyes in ease, to not show the concern so AiLin wouldn’t go through panic. With an easier tone did she reply, "It seems Miss AiLin you have partial amnesia due to PTSD. Have you recently recalled your past memories that you have forgotten all of a sudden?"

Shocked, AiLin nodded, "But I thought it’s because those memories are just old."

"Think about it, were the memories too old for you to remember or because all those memories you have forgotten were hose that had caused you so much misery and regret?"

AiLin touched her head and fell into a deadly silence. Now she realized all the truth and felt a sudden sense of panic, "How do I retrieve those memories?"

"Calm down Miss AiLin," the doctor gently advised, "It’s best not to force all those memories from your head to return. Truthfully when one’s heart has been broken too many times, their body would start to go in a survival mode to protect the host. Those memories were gone because a part of yourself wants to protect your sanity."

AiLin felt a heartache. She squeezed her chest with her fingers, her lips moistening as she showed Dr. Mei a tiny smile, "Can a heart that’s broken to pieces still break again?"

Dr. mei’s eyes widened slightly but it slowly eased back as she spoke, "Your heart will be healed. Miss AiLin, have a little more faith in yourself. You have the right to mend your own heart, people hurt you and tried to break you but you’re stronger than that and I can see it. So trust in yourself, trust that your heart won’t ever be broken again. Trust that it would heal so strongly that nothing could leave a scratch on you again. Let’s be stronger."

AiLin could only see herself finding it difficult to believe to Dr Mei’s words but perhaps because how encouraging she sounded did AiLin felt swayed to believe to the doctor’s words.

"Let’s start again," Dr. Mei said as AiLin leaned back and closed her eyes again. There was a smell of sweet vanilla and cinnamon as a candle had been lit up by Dr. Mei. "Through your darkest time were there someone who stayed by your side?"

AiLin closed her eyes, her initial reply was, "No..." but then it drawled and changed, "Yes. A kind young boy."

"What do you remember about his kindness?"

AiLin wondered what she was talking about but soon she recalled about the delinquent who she had always butt heads with during middle school. He was there to save her when she was about to faint after being locked out of her own home. Then he brought her back home and after that day... they continue to cross paths.

Oddly enough, that young boy began to stop annoying her as he usually did.

His sarcasm was still a talent that one should envy but he seemed to be much softer in his actions than before to the point that it surprised Ailin.

That day like any others, she noticed him behind the school track and was worried he was going to pull another box of cigarette. Jumping out of her initial walk to the teacher’s faculty room, she rushed toward the young delinquent, her voice loud as she saw the white stick that was saddled between his red lips.

"I knew it! I knew something was off with how you haven’t been smoking the past few days. Turns out you’re smoking behind my back!" She rushed toward his side, marching so quickly that she saw his eyes that widened in shock as she reached out her hand to the white stick that was out of his mouth. She pulled the white stick only to feel her own steps swaying and her body moving forward, fast falling into his body.

The delinquent was shocked by her sudden action. Not only did she try to rob his candy, she was also running toward him with such angry face and now fell face first toward him. The two tackled down as he was too surprised to brace for the impact of the fall. By the time he noticed it, he had fallen down the ground and opened his eyes in annoyance only to find the large dark black eyes that were looking at him like a stained glass and her lips the were only a thread away from brushing into his own lips.