I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality
Chapter 288 - 161: Papermen Funeral Procession, Friend Entrusts an Orphan

Chapter 288: Chapter 161: Papermen Funeral Procession, Friend Entrusts an Orphan

Outside Prefecture City, as Xu Qing and his group prepared to spur their horses and return to Linhe, Guo Dongyang was still inquiring about the details of the monster hunting, like whether the magnificent tiger on the granary roof was Xu Qing’s ally.

"Tiger? Where’s the tiger? Did you see a tiger?"

Xuan Yu remained silent in front of outsiders, while Guan Dazhuang shook his head and said, "Didn’t see any."

Guo Dongyang shamelessly held Xu Qing’s arm, pulling him aside, like an old child, always wanting to know things a child shouldn’t.

"Brother Xu, I call you Brother Xu, so give me the truth, old brother has been restless all day, it’s really hard to bear."

The truth? Do you want to hear a corpse’s truth?

"Brother Guo might not have been seeing things, the cat takes tiger as its master, perhaps yesterday my cat, for the convenience of catching mice, found an apprentice to help, it’s not unthinkable..."

Xuan Yu felt quite pleased upon hearing this, and Guan Dazhuang didn’t find anything wrong with Xu Qing’s words, as he and Sun Erzhuang both joined the Cat Immortal Hall, calling them disciples wasn’t exaggerating.

Guo Dongyang has traveled the world for many years, met people of all faces and encountered bizarre events.

People like him have some sharp eyes and cunning.

Seeing Xu Qing unwilling to reveal more truth, Guo Dongyang stopped probing.

However, when parting, Guo Dongyang suddenly asked the yellow-clad man beside Xu Qing a question.

"Brother, do you normally eat meat or vegetarian?"

Guan Dazhuang instinctively replied, "I eat more meat, don’t like vegetarian food."

Xu Qing heard this and looked at Guan Dazhuang, not pleasantly, and said, "Grown man, still picky about food, when we get back, eat vegetarian for three days, fix your picky habit."

Guan Dazhuang, realizing his mistake, immediately shut his mouth and glared fiercely at Guo Dongyang who tricked him.

The latter felt a chill, as if being eyed by a fierce beast.

Watching Xu Qing and his group depart, Guo Dongyang chuckled, whistled, and headed back to the teahouse.

On the way back to Linhe, the carriage carried a plainly-dressed old coachman and a delicate young lady sitting inside.

The old man’s long whiskers had been shaved by Xu Qing; the disguised Gu Qiao’Er was no longer recognizable as the former Mouse King.

Gu Qiao’Er covered her face with a white veil, rarely exposing herself. Now sitting in the carriage, she was like a pampered daughter of a wealthy family, and those without cultivation couldn’t see through her illusion.

Looking at this father and daughter maintaining their human forms extravagantly after ’bankruptcy,’ Xu Qing imagined how glorious the Gray Immortal Hall must have been.

A centipede dies, but doesn’t stiffen.

Xu Qing estimated that the old man still grasped quite a bit of incense.

This could count as bringing assets into partnership, right?

Xu Qing rented the broker’s carriage, transporting everyone with ordinary horses.

Along the way, other carriages occasionally passed by Xu Qing, which he didn’t mind until a monk rode a thin donkey past him, making Xu Qing realize something amiss.

How could his horse be so slow?

He glanced at the horse, the red jujube horse was sweating all over, each step seeming like dragging a thousand-pound weight.

"Xu Immortal Family, how many pounds do you weigh?"

Xuan Yu also seemed to notice something wrong, it looked up puzzledly and examined Xu Qing.

"Not sure, I haven’t measured, why do you ask, Xuan Yu?"

Xuan Yu’s gaze turned to the panting horse, reasoning, "Look at this horse, exhausted like this, someone must be too heavy, otherwise how can’t it even catch up with that monk’s donkey?"

Xu Qing heard this and looked at the monk riding the donkey ahead, the monk having a big belly like Maitreya, smiling at them.

"That monk must be laughing at us!"

The cat got competitive and urged the old coachman Gu Qiao’Er to drive faster and overtake the opposite.

"I see; it must be Dazhuang that’s too heavy, such a big tiger, making the horse incapable of breathing."

Guan Dazhuang murmured, "I’m only eight hundred pounds; a bad horse can carry a thousand pounds, this horse is a robust adult horse, pulling a two thousand-pound carriage is nothing, how could it be me that’s too heavy."

After speaking, Guan Dazhuang looked at ancient Gu Qiao’Er inside the carriage and realized, "People say ’thousand-pound lady’; I think Gu Daoist’s daughter is the heaviest."

"Dazhuang, read more books in the future, at worst I’ll find you a teacher, if it doesn’t work, attending private school for a few days when we’re free..."

Xu Qing spoke earnestly, and after he finished, Gu Qiao’Er quietly replied, "I’m less than fifty pounds."

"..."

Less than fifty pounds, Xu Qing was speechless upon hearing.

Say, a five-pound mouse is already large!

Xuan Yu finished the circle, finally resting its gaze on Xu Qing: "It must be Xu Immortal Family being too heavy!"

Xu Qing denied: "I’m an ordinary human, at most weighing a hundred and fifty pounds, how can it be me; it must be this horse having leg issues, the crafty broker’s assistant must’ve sold me a bad horse!"

Xuan Yu stared at Xu Qing seriously and said, "A few days ago when it rained, I personally saw you step into the mud by the eaves, sinking this deep."

The black cat raised a paw, high above its head, the height far from the carriage floor, a foot and a half.

Xu Qing was speechless.

Iron Armored Corpse weighs as heavy as wrought iron, Silver Armored Corpse even heavier.

Xu Qing estimated he was probably not much lighter than Guan Dazhuang now, perhaps heavier.

When walking, he often used the Light Body Skill, or attached Armor Horse Talisman with ’White Cloud Rising’ characters, chanting the Crane Feather Cloud Riding Spell to lighten his burden, also preventing others from noticing abnormalities.