I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality
Chapter 287 - 160: Going All Out! (Part 2)

Chapter 287: Chapter 160: Going All Out! (Part 2)

"If any of you wishes to follow the old man, stay put. If you want to follow me to become immortals, come to my side."

Gu Zixu looked at the elders who once belonged to his hall and shouted, "Have you all forgotten the hall’s rules?"

A few old fellows glanced at Gu Zixu, who appeared tough on the outside but was weak inside, and then looked at the white-faced young man who stood with a relaxed smile, seeming extraordinarily ’valuable beyond words.’

The choice seemed obvious.

"Gu Zixu, our old hall has long been gone. Look at how much incense is still burning in the Dharma Realm? You, don’t be too proud; following the Cat Immortal Hall at least could get court approval, which is a sweet deal."

Gu Zixu chuckled angrily, "Working with cats as a rat, isn’t it like seeking skin from a tiger? Do you think you’ll be the ones to get approved?"

Upon hearing this, the rat spirit with the sharp mouth and small face bared its teeth and sneered, "Gu Zixu, when you married your daughter to please the Cat Immortal Hall, you didn’t say that then..."

"Shut up! The old man married his daughter based on the mistaken belief that the Cat Immortal Hall was friendly and never oppressed the weak. Unlike you, those corrupt officials had harmed your hall, yet you still want to work for them. If you don’t feel embarrassed, I feel embarrassed for you!"

Gu Zixu’s face turned blue and then white, as if he was about to reveal his true form in anger.

Xu Qing laughed inwardly as he watched the few big rats come to him, nodding and bowing, expressing loyalty.

He put down the Xuan Yu, swung the axe around, the mountain-splitting axe weighing over three hundred pounds felt as light as nothing in his hand.

These rats had all become spirits, each with decades of cultivation, but they were still no match for him.

Flipping the axe, Xu Qing hit them like swatting flies, leaving them silent.

Xuan Yu’s mouth opened slightly, still pondering how the previously amicable Xu Immortal Family could suddenly turn hostile...

However, seeing Xu Qing eliminate these harmful rats like chopping vegetables, Xuan Yu felt exceptionally relieved.

Gu Zixu and Gu Qiao’Er supported each other’s arms, both shocked and terrified in their hearts.

This man was too fickle; one moment he talked about killing rats, and the next he did it. How brutal!

Xu Qing took out a piece of yellow burning paper, wiping the dirt off the axe, saying, "Brother, these subordinates aren’t very loyal."

"Now I’ve helped you clean house, the remaining ones are trusted companions."

Gu Zixu looked at the lone old servant left beside him and his daughter, thinking, well, you’ve almost killed all my people, leaving only trusted companions!

"Daoist friend, what do you intend to do?"

Xu Qing sat back in his chair, beside the chair leg, Xuan Yu lifted his head, the corners of his mouth curving into a smile.

It seemed he hadn’t misjudged, the Xu Immortal Family never disappointed him.

"Didn’t you say you wanted to work with my Cat Immortal Hall, Daoist Gu? Now’s your chance; my Cat Immortal Hall has ten halls, four have been occupied, but there are still some missing immortal guardians."

"Those lacking good temperaments, ill-behaved or difficult to teach, can’t be an immortal guardian in our hall."

"Daoist Xu means..." The old rat became clever, and amid his rage, Gu Zixu caught on, though to prevent misunderstanding, the old immortal chose to probe first.

This young man doesn’t follow the usual rules, and after this encounter, Gu Zixu dared not rely on age and experience.

"My Cat Immortal Hall needs an envoy to gather wealth and purify virtues. Daoist Gu is kind-hearted and skilled in gathering wealth. Seeing the layout of this rat home, Daoist Gu should also be well-versed in Feng Shui and geography."

"If Daoist Gu is interested, you could oversee the Feng Shui Hall, also handling the duties of gathering wealth and purifying virtues."

Gu Zixu frowned and pondered for a moment, then suddenly said, "I might be kind-hearted, but my tolerance is limited. If you want me in the hall, that’s fine, but regarding this rat home and grain storage...

"I’ve invested much in building this rat home. If your intention is to please corrupt officials and destroy my home, even if I join the Cat Immortal Hall, I’ll be discontented."

Xu Qing laughed silently, it turned out this Jin Sect rat king was a stubborn old man.

"The rat home can be rebuilt, but if Qiao’Er and her father are gone, what’s the point of having just the home? It won’t produce any offspring."

Xu Qing shook his head, "This can’t be rushed. If you two trust me, come into my hall, and regarding the grudge against the officials framing you, once the storm passes, I’ll help you settle it. Actually, this matter is part of my plan."

What plan does Xu Qing have? He came to the relief warehouse today to handle the rat situation, so there was no plan. He merely got the idea after seeing Gu Zixu’s skill in moving things underground.

When Gu Zixu was in his Gray Immortal Hall, he was often promised with big dreams.

Lost items would be found, illnesses cured, or there’d be food and money at home, and they’d burn incense to give thanks. However, most of them were mere promises, and when things did happen, few people offered incense as thanks.

Gu Zixu didn’t buy into it. He wanted a plan from Xu Qing, not just words saying he’d make decisions for him in the future.

Empty promises, and if he and his granddaughter worked hard for nothing because of one sentence, wouldn’t it become a colossal joke?

Worst case, once used, they’d become two plates of food on someone’s dining table.

Xu Qing glanced at the old servant standing beside Gu Zixu.

The latter was perceptive and bowed before leaving.

Xu Qing then looked at Gu Qiao’Er.

Gu Zixu rolled his eyes and stopped his daughter from leaving.

"Speak freely, Daoist friend, my daughter isn’t an outsider."

"That’s not necessarily true, if she marries out..."

Gu Qiao’Er twisted the corner of her dress with small hands, shyly saying, "Since I’ve married my husband, I belong to his family."

"Stop!"

Xu Qing put away the Qi Observation Skill, glanced at the slightly fluffed-up but adorably cute cat beside him, and finally felt a little calmer.

"I’ve been invited to manage the rat infestation. If something happens in the grain storage now, I would naturally become a suspect to the officials."

"After things settle here, in a year or so, it’ll be time to address this issue."

Gu Zixu frowned, "What does Daoist friend plan to do then?"

Xu Qing snapped his fingers, igniting a wisp of Yin-Burning Fire, smiling, "Everyone knows the relief warehouse has no grain, so when a fire dragon breaks out, the officials wouldn’t feel pain."

Others might not know if the relief warehouse has grain, but Gu Zixu knew clearly.

"You want to burn the grain?"

"It’s hard for farmers to grow grain; why would I burn it?" Xu Qing chuckled at Gu Zixu, "You’re best at moving wealth and things, swap the grain in the warehouse for straw and hay. Even if it’s completely burnt later, no one would suspect the rat king who was once framed stole the grain."

"Once the storm passes, when the grain is out of town, I’ll have a way to distribute it to those who need it."

Gu Zixu’s eyes brightened, but he still had doubts, "The world is full of experts with foresight. If anyone calculates the truth..."

"There’s no need for you to worry about that. You just do your duty, establish contact with the Cat Immortal Hall, and I’ll handle the rest."

With the Heaven Concealing Skill of grade celestial level, Xu Qing’s related matters are veiled from the heavenly insights, making it impossible for heavenly decrees to be checked, relieving many concerns.

"Then... how will the Sect Leader explain to the grain officials later?"

Xu Qing stood up and went over to the corpses of rats that were several times larger than cats, smiling, "The rat king and its confidant are eliminated, the remaining rat group scattered, our Cat Immortal Hall addressing the rat infestation will undoubtedly accomplish the task perfectly."

That night, tens of thousands of rats suddenly erupted from the Jinmen Grain Storage; they heard the news that the Cat Immortal Hall’s Cat Immortal swallowed the rat king in one bite.

This news came from the old servant who was by the rat king’s side. Leaderless, the rats followed the old servant’s instructions, pouring from underground into the open, scattering away from the grain storage.

The warehouse officer and Guo Dongyang were in the room, drinking by candlelight, when suddenly they heard the squealing of rats outside. They opened the door to see a mass of rats fleeing like disaster-stricken migrants.

The warehouse officer felt the chills running down his spine, his drunkenness dissipating rapidly, while Guo Dongyang excitedly ran to the door, letting the rats run over his feet.

Looking towards the origin of the rat swarm, through the darkness, Guo Dongyang faintly saw a spotted tiger standing guardian atop a distant building.

Beside the tiger, a person and a cat stood on the roof, silently watching the rats flee the grain storage.

"There truly are extraordinary people in this world!"

Guo Dongyang rubbed his eyes, and when he looked again, the roof was empty, not a trace of a person, tiger, or cat in sight.