Who would study psychology unless they had some issues?!
Chapter 446 - 439: This World Is Diverse—The Only Standard Is Your Own Feelings

Chapter 446: Chapter 439: This World Is Diverse—The Only Standard Is Your Own Feelings

The consultation was almost over.

Nan Zhubin closed the form that simply recorded the visitor’s situation, preparing to use the closing remarks to send the client off.

However, the visitor hurriedly asked, "Teacher, I have two small questions. Can I ask them?"

Nan Zhubin glanced at the clock on the wall.

Forty minutes, the standard duration, had just passed since the consultation began.

Extending it a little wouldn’t hurt.

The premise was that they were indeed "small questions."

"Of course," said Nan Zhubin, then assumed a focused expression.

The visitor pursed her lips cautiously and asked, "Teacher Nan, according to the ’Personality Development Theory’ you just mentioned..."

"Are there many people like me who deviate from the ’normal’ case?"

Everyone has some Avoidant thoughts... no, it should be said that most visitors have similar ideas; it’s just that Avoidant visitors pay extra attention to them.

Nan Zhubin organized his thoughts: "Strictly speaking, it’s not a ’normalization.’ It’s an academic, ideal ’standardization.’"

Nan Zhubin didn’t answer directly, but the effect of emotional stability he provided was much better than mere soothing.

He explained: "This stage of personality development is like the various medical standards and nutritional standards in hospitals."

Because of the mystique of psychology and some issues with traditional cultural backgrounds, visitors tend to overthink.

In such cases, using familiar analogies helps visitors better accept their own situation.

That’s why Nan Zhubin often uses medical examples in consultations.

Nan Zhubin said, "Various standards, like—what’s the optimal diet structure for children of a certain age, how much protein must be consumed daily but not exceed a certain amount, otherwise strange issues like inflammation or heat might arise..."

Nan Zhubin looked at the visitor.

He saw her sitting upright again with her hands placed on her knees.

However, her fingers tightened involuntarily, and her lips were slightly pursed.

She seemed nervous, keeping up a defense, waiting for a judgment.

Nan Zhubin chuckled lightly to himself and raised the curve of his smiling lips slightly higher.

"But—"

Nan Zhubin’s voice didn’t rush directly at Lin Xi as she expected; instead, it veered in front of her and wrapped around her.

"But some people are naturally prone to inflammation, some have low blood sugar, some get motion sickness—does it disrupt their lives? Or—does anyone have no issues at all?"

"We live in a complex world; people living in the world are diverse as well."

"And these psychological theories and standards, their emergence, they came after humans appeared and societies formed. They are merely summaries of some ’phenomena’ or ’patterns,’" Nan Zhubin smiled, "In this case, if we demand someone to grow according to a certain ’theory’ or ’standard,’ it might be a little counterproductive, don’t you think?"

Lin Xi was taken aback.

Knowledge is important, but knowing how to use it correctly is far more important than just learning it.

"Take the ’Eight Stages of Personality Development Theory’ we just discussed as an example. It’s not a strict standard that believes everyone must grow according to its eight stages to be considered ’normal.’"

"Its significance is when individuals, due to some accidental life events, experience unbearable pain at some point in the future, they can use it for reference and comparison to more easily understand their problems and thus have a direction to solve them."

In formal theoretical applications, the theory surely has a broader range of uses.

But in psychological consultation, for this visitor, Nan Zhubin is demonstrating absolute sincerity.

The role of the ’Eight Stages of Personality Development Theory’ at this moment is precisely this.

"As I initially said to you. Whether ’many’ or ’few,’ ’normal’ or ’abnormal,’ even if your life is far from any standard or theory, as long as we feel fine ourselves, that’s irrelevant."

Nan Zhubin turned his palm upwards, pointing at the visitor: "The most important thing is our own feelings."

As the words fell,

the tension on Lin Xi’s body instantly collapsed.

Seeing the visitor’s emotions becoming increasingly varied and complex, Nan Zhubin smiled.

While making sure his voice carried the ability to soothe emotions, he pushed the process a bit further:

"You said earlier you had two small concerns; what’s the other one?"

Lin Xi took a deep breath: "Teacher Nan, the issues I have... are very stubborn. Honestly, even though I heard a lot today, I’m not sure I can solve them once I leave..."

"But, after talking to you today, I do feel a lot better."

The visitor looked hopeful: "So, even if we don’t address the issue in the future, but just want to find someone to chat with each time... Can we still come to you?"

[Posture straightens up, even leaning slightly back.]

[Hands crossed and placed protectively over the abdomen.]

[Lips tightly compressed.]

[However... fingers and knees, the distal limbs are trembling slightly.]

Nan Zhubin silently analyzed in his heart.

Is this Transference?

—There indeed is.

But only partially.

In Nan Zhubin’s eyes, there was more of a Catastrophic Expectation and an anxious desire for trust.

Although the visitor’s Avoidant Attachment Style doesn’t appear to be the main issue right now.

But it indeed influences the visitor in various ways.

[Such multi-dimensional intersecting situations require additional care when designing intervention plans in the future.]

However, the current situation also indicates that the other’s Over-independence is starting to collapse, and they’re beginning to further build a consultation relationship.

As the consultation continues to advance, this is good news.

Moreover, the visitor’s request is reasonable.

Nan Zhubin thought for a moment and replied, "Of course, the establishment of phased goals in consultation is something to be confirmed through mutual communication with the visitor."

"—If we have further consultations."

...

"Brother Huang, do you think this visitor will come back again?"

Outside the door, Mo Kai nervously asked Brother Huang, the consulting assistant beside him.

Upon hearing Mo Kai’s question, the consulting assistant named Huang seemed a bit apprehensive.

He glanced around, ensuring that no ears were directed at them.

Then he let out a small sigh of relief, adopting a senior’s tone to analyze the situation for Mo Kai.