The Crown and The Rose
Chapter 63: Are You In Love?

Chapter 63: Are You In Love?

The Crown

"So you are telling me that after you were banished from the palace, you just happened to have fallen on the demon lord Vermilion’s lap?" Her eyes are wide with shock. This is a question that will make her realize why I am different now.

"Yeah..." I let out a dry chuckle, my heart squeezes tightly as she spells out Vermilion’s name.

"Are you sure that you are Lush Von Blade?" She leans in closer, her eyes scanning my soul through my skin, "Because I have never heard of a single person who has survived after stepping foot in that demonic territory. How are you still alive? And how come that you haven’t been killed yet?"

I ponder over how to respond to this question, my forefinger tapping on my cheek, "Well... maybe because I am useful?"

Erick snorts from the side, still siping at his long-gone cold tea, "Lush, you are everything but useful."

As much as I hate to admit it, Erick is right. I press my lips into a thin line and give him a distraught look, "Oh? Are you useful?"

"I don’t remember saying that I am useful." He splays his hands out and gives me a tight-lipped smile, "I am just one of your guard dogs. I do what you tell me to do."

And again, he is right. I fight back an urge to roll my eyes and turn my attention back to Rosalia, "Well maybe I am not useful—"

"You are more than useless, Lush." Erick points out jokingly, "You got yourself almost killed in your first two assignments and the Lord had to rush there to save you."

And once again he is right. Rosalia now looks beyond shocked, "Wait, wait, wait a damn minute. So you are telling me that Lord Vermilion saved you?"

The three of us—Zhen Xin, Erick, and I—nod in sync and Rosalia looks like someone has just told her that the sun rises from the east.

"I can’t believe it." Rosalia blurts out, "He saved you?"

"The Lord even let His Highness ride his dragon form." Zhen Xin climbs onto my shoulder once again.

And I take it back when I said she looked beyond shocked because she is now looking beyond shocked, "Hold up, hold up a damn minute. You are telling me that THE LORD VERMILION let him ride him? I mean ride his back?"

And we three nod again. Rosalia looks like she is about to faint.

"Are you okay...?" I ask her nervously.

"I-I need to sit down." She says and Erick immediately grabs a sit and places it beside her so she can sit there, "I can’t believe this..."

There is silence now. There is no one in this courtyard right now, only birds chirping, some squirrels playing on the grass and the soothing sound of water flowing from the fountain beside us, Now that I think about it, it feels unbelievable even to me.

Was it all a dream?

I wonder. My heart is swelling once again with some emotion that I’d rather not have. I am missing him... Those red eyes... those eyes that won’t even look at me anymore... the way he speaks my name with so much ice in it... I never want to hear it again, but I want to see him again. I want his eyes on mine like they used to...

Suddenly gloom crosses my face again. There is a stinging pain in my chest and I fight back an urge to rub my chest to soothe it, though I doubt it will even help. He got rid of me so easily... but why can’t I do the same? Why...why... my heart aches like it does?

I clench and unclench my fist to fight back the tears that threaten to fall from my eyes. I feel Zhen Xin pawing my cheek, the gesture warm and comforting, he is telling me not to cry. I grit my teeth and bite my lip, locking the tears away, though my leashes are damp. I just hope Rosalia doesn’t notice it.

***

Rosalia has arranged the rooms of one of the secret pavilions of the royal palace of the Red Empire. Only her most trusted servants are allowed to enter the pavilions. She said that she would accompany me when I head out tomorrow to look into the job that I was given.

It’s so cruel... that I know that it is all for naught but still, I am doing this, just because he told me to...

I let out a dry, humorless chuckle as I lean against the railing of the balcony of my room and stare at the night sky. The night sky is clear and the cold autumn breeze is whispering that the winter is approaching. The wind smells like chrysanthemums. Zhen Xin is perched on the railing beside my hand. He has curled up and most seemingly is sleeping.

I wonder when I became the puppet of Vermilion’s hand. Maybe from the moment he laid his eyes on me. Or maybe from the moment when I wished for the things that I shouldn’t. Who knows.

"Lush," Rosalia’s voice pulls me back to reality and I spin around to face her. She is standing at my arm’s length, "You alright?" Worry forms lines between her eyebrows.

"I am fine..." It came out wrong than I intended. My voice cracks and my breath trembles.

Oh, Gods... I am so obvious...

"You know, you are definitely not." She walks to stand beside me and leans her back against the railing, her arms folded across her chest. "You know, I can read you like a book even if you are the right-handed man of the demon lord, even if I am seeing you after a long year."

Her remarks make me want to smile and I do just that, just a little. But the gloom in my eyes is far greater than the small spark of warmth.

"Lush, are you in love?"

And before I know it, I am blurting, "Yes..."