The Crown and The Rose
Chapter 64: Hurting

Chapter 64: Hurting

The Crown

"Now, are you ready to tell me how the fuck you changed this much during the whole year that I haven’t seen you?" Then something clicks in her head, "No, let me correct my sentence a little, what the fuck in the world happened in these three months after you have been banished?"

I know, the moment I said ’Yes’ I fucked so bad... Now even the Gods can’t help me fix the damage I have caused the moment I said ’Yes’.

"Well...things happen..." I sigh and lean against the railing beside her, "But how did you know that I am in love? I don’t think I am that obvious. I mean, Erick couldn’t figure it out."

"You are once again forgetting that I am the only person in this goddamn world who reads you through." She swings her finger in the air leisurely, "And other than that... you have become more breathtaking since the last time I saw you."

I feel the heat creeping in as I hear her blunt compliment, "How is this a sign that I am in love?"

"Your eyes are more dazzling, your hair is longer and shinier, you are leaner—though you already were very lean— and your eyes scream, ’I am heading over the hills in someone’." She explains her logic which absolutely makes no sense.

"This is absurd," I comment bitterly.

"I know it is." She is unaffected, "But this is a woman’s intrusion about her best friend, so it is nearly impossible that I am wrong." She looks at me from the corner of my eyes and a slow smirk forms on her face, "So tell me about her. And please don’t tell me she is from the demon realm and farless a demon herself."

Her words make me nervous and uncomfortable. First of all, it is not a ’her’ but a ’him’. Second, not only is ’she’ not from the demon realm, but ’she’ is also the ruler. Third, ’she’ is the demon lord. How am I supposed to tell her all this? Surely I don’t want my best friend to have a heart attack because of my choice of love.

"Are you only gonna stare and not gonna spit?" She lifts an eyebrow.

And I sigh, "What do you want me to say?" I rub my clammy hands together, keeping my eyes low.

"Tell me what you want to, Lush." Her voice is much softer and tender, "It is fine even if you don’t want to tell me. I totally understand." Just when I start to think about the past year not only have I changed but she also has changed. But she just has to open my mouth to prove me wrong, "You can just write it down for me. I am good to go."

I press my lips to hold back a peal of laughter. "You never change, do you?"

"Heh, do you think I am like you who fell in love and changed himself?" Rosalia turns and snickers, "So tell me who is this great girl who made my Lush this way?"

I still my heart and rub the back of my neck, "Well, it’s a ’him’." I say quietly.

"Oh." She blurts, then brusts, "OH?!"

I bite my lip to suppress my grin, "And who is this ’him’?" She looks at me eagerly.

"It’s a... demon... the demon lord... of the south," I say, so softly that it is barely audible but she hears it.

But she is oddly quiet. I wonder what happened so I turn to look at her. But she is not standing beside me, she has lifted her skirt up and is sprinting through the door. "Don’t you dare move! Let me bring my chair to sit!"

I am not struggling to decide on what to do, laugh or cry. I am at a loss. I run after her and pull her back toward me by her wrist.

"We are NOT about to start a tea party about this, Rose," I say in a dismissive tone. "There is nothing to talk about. He got rid of me by sending me here, he doesn’t feel the way I do."

The last few words make Roalia stall, she turns to me and eyes me with something I can put a finger on, and at this moment, I don’t want to. "So this a one-sided love story...?" She asks quietly.

I chuckle bitterly, "I doubt if we can even call it a ’love story’." And I do everything to stop my fist from trembling and my heart from breaking. But it’s hard not to. I have fallen in love just once and fate has to be so cruel...

Maybe no, it’s not the fate, it’s me. It’s me, who made all the things go wrong. Everything...

"Lush..." I feel she wraps her hands around my neck and pulls me in for the tight hug.

I let myself be pulled in, my arms automatically locking her body to mine as I bury my face onto her neck. I am very thankful that she is tall enough for me to hug her properly. Five feet and ten inches... I am sure she is wearing heels.

Good...

I inhale her smell and start to shake uncontrollably but I don’t cry. I won’t cry. It doesn’t feel very meaningful. He won’t know if I cry for him. He won’t care if I break for him. Suppose I fall apart for him and he will toss me away if I become useless to him. He doesn’t care... and he will never care.

Rosalia rubs my back gently as she hugs me tightly, "It’s fine..." She whispers into my ear, "Shit happens... we need to accept them and move on... You can stay here for as long as you want Lush... You don’t have to go back to him if you don’t want to."

Her words do a little to loosen the knot forming on my chest, but I nod anyway. I can’t do this to myself. I can’t be this hard on myself who simply doesn’t care. She is right. If I don’t see him, then maybe... maybe, I will be able to get rid of all the feelings, jungling inside me. And maybe I will be able to forget him. He has already thrown me aside, so, I don’t have to worry about him and pursuing me.

"Yes... I will stay here until the banishment is lifted and I can go back to the royal palace of Blade." This seems the best option and I will take it. I will stop hurting myself.

"Right..." She replies.

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