Married To A CEO. Omega
Chapter 57: Side Story-09

Chapter 57: Side Story-09

RUTH

"Leo, what are you doing here?" I rub my face frustratedly, lying in my bed like a living corpse. "You didn’t have work today?"

"I am here to see you asshole." Leo is sitting beside my bed on a chair with his one leg resting over his other and arms crossed over his chest. He is wearing a stern expression on his face. His pink suit is pricking my sensitive vision. "You took off from the hospital. Why?"

"I was making so many damn mistakes and was really out of it." I scoff, "Why do you even care? Go to your husband, Leo."

"Stop sweeping bullshits, Ruth." Leo barks, "You are looking like you are in drugs. What the fuck are you even doing?"

"Fuck off, Leo." I roar, losing all my damned composure that I have been living since the day John stormed out of my office with teary eyes. I think he left with my heart too that day. I feel so empty... "Isn’t it all because of you? Aren’t you the one who forced me to cut ties with John?"

"What the fuck, Ruth?" He bellows, "You are the one who is at the fault for all this mess! You are the one who started all of this shit and now blaming me for the outcome? You are the one who made John fall for you and then you backed off."

"Yes." I roar. "It’s all my fault that Alice died. It was all my fault that I broke John’s heart. All of it is my fault!" Grief and guilt fists my heart and tears stream down my face, my teeth gritted as I face the blank ceiling.

There is the sudden plop beside me and a presence of another person laying beside me engulfs me. I sniff.

"It’s not all your fault, Ruth." Leo grabs my hand and squeezes my hand warmly, "It was all fate. You should just do what your heart tells you to. No more looking back at the past. It will only break you and suck the light of your soul. You should tell John how you feel. It’s not too late. I know he will understand."

"But do you think Alice has forgiven me for what happened two years ago?" I keep my eyes locked on the ceiling.

"She didn’t even consider blaming you for her death, Ruth, believe me." Leo assures me, "She never held you guilty for any of the things that happened that night. Trust me. Because she loved you."

My eyes well up with tears once again. "I am sorry, Leo." I wail. I turn to Leo and hug him as I bawl my eyes out, "I am sorry. I shouldn’t have lost my temper with you earlier. I shouldn’t have said those things to John. I broke his heart. I couldn’t cherish him when he was all mine. I am sorry."

Leo just lay beside me and pats my back gently, "It’s okay to make some mistakes like these once in a while. All you just need to do is fix them and everything will be fine. Believe me it will be fine."

"Will I be able to make everything right?" I look up to Leo, with sparks of hope gleaming in my eyes.

Leo nods reassuringly, "if it’s you then I know it will be fine. John is a very good person. For sure he will understand. You just need to be determined and truthful to yourself. Never lie to your heart and you will just be fine."

***

In my life I have always run away from all my problems. I ignore the things I think I can’t handle or is too much for me to comprehend. I avoid getting attached. And leave all the problems for Leo to handle. He has always stayed by my side and has cleaned all my mess without complaining about it.

But now this is the time I handle my problems by myself. The problem is mine and the person I long for. I can’t rely on Leo to help me out anymore. He has already done more than enough. More than he should have. And now I have to decide whether I should live in the misery of the death of my past lover or be with a person who loves me and wants me more than anyone or anything else.

I know I am not worthy of John’s love but I am greedy. I want him all for myself. I want his love and that warm embrace. I want to see that vulnerable sleeping face after our sex everyday. He is too good for this world. So, I want to steal him away and lock him up somewhere people can’t go. So that the only thing I see is him and the only thing he sees is me.

I feel so lost and so empty that I can’t explain. I have lost my appetite, lost my sleep and my focus. I even snap at some of the stuff at the hospital.

I know I look bad. Small needles like bread poking out from my chin and these heavy bags underneath my eyes and bloodshot eyes are giving me so obviously away that I don’t even try to hide them anymore as I make my way into John’ apartment building.

I know John isn’t doing well without me too. I saw it at dinner night at Leo’s, a few days ago. . His beautiful eyes are puffed and swollen. Clearly understandable that she has cried so much that those eyes are mushy now. To think that I am the reason to make John cry so ugly. My heart clenches very painfully and my lungs try to give out on me at least for the sixth time in the day.

I hold my breath as I slowly approach the black wooden door at the end of the hallway. ’GOODIE’ is curved beautifully on the top of the door with golden strokes. Even the name of his is soothing me now.

I ring the bell hesitantly. After a few good seconds someone approaches the door with uneven food steps. The door swings open and I pause. John is standing at the door. His eyes are at his forehead. But without saying anything he tries to slam the door shut almost immediately on my face and as if I would let him do that when I haven’t explained a single thing to him. I reflexively block the door from shutting down with my hand.

"What the fuck are you doing, Ruth?!" John roars trying with his life to shut the door on me. "Let go! Why are you here?! Get out!"

I gripped the door harder as I plead, "Please John listen to me! I-I have something to explain to you!"

"There is nothing to us anymore, Ruth! You crushed it with your own palm!" John retorts, "Get the fuck out of my life now!" His voice cracks.

"Please let me in! Please, just five minutes. I plead as I push the door harder, poking my head inside his apartment, "Please..."

John glances up at me and his grip on the door Loosens, "Just five minutes after that you will be on your way and I will be on mine. This is the last time. After this we are total strangers to each other. I don’t want to see your face anymore."

I nod. He straightens up and steps aside from the entrance to let me in. I slowly come in.

"John, I love you." I confess as I stall midway down the hallway to his living space. "I know it’s too late to say that but I do. I really do I-I just_"

Slap!

"How dare you say this to me now?!" He bellows, tears flowing at the edge of the rim of his eyes, threatening to escape any moment now. "How dare you?! Two weeks ago you said you loved someone else and now you are telling me that you love me now?!" He grabs my collar, rage and sorrow consuming his entire being.

"She...She is dead, John! Dead!" I roar as I grab his wrists, "It’s been two years! Two whole damned years!"

"Then-Then why did you say that you love someone else that day at your office?" John stalls, even his tears do. He looks really shocked and bewildered at the same time as if he can’t process what he is hearing.

"Because...I still love her but as much as I love her I love you too John." My head falls, "I Love you just the way I did Alice. Even more than that. Please..."

Pow!

"You little scumbag!" Erwin slams his fist on my face and I fall on the ground in the impact, "So you are the reason, John is crying his eyes out over the week?! Huh?!"

"Erwin!" John shreeks in horror, his eyes bloodshot and hand clamped over his mouth.

How did it end up like this? Why is Erwin here...? I have no idea what I should do now...?