ISEKAI? More like I See Crap!
Chapter 315: Chaos in the Lava Fields ( 315 )

Chapter 315: Chaos in the Lava Fields ( 315 )

"Ellyn?" Hazuki tilted his head back to glance at the girl sitting on his shoulders.

"Hmm? Yes?" she replied, swinging her feet lightly, as if riding a gentle breeze instead of a tired human mule.

"Do you know where Fire Grun is?" Hazuki asked. "Because this ancient puffball won’t tell me anything."

Ridan shot him a glare. "Do you think I have the time—or the peace—to help you right now!?" He gestured helplessly at the cloudy spirit girl clinging to his side. "Just look at this—ah, this girl spirit keeps rubbing against me!"

Syaria nuzzled her foggy cheek against his with a dreamy sigh. "Mou~ We were a couple in life. And now, after a thousand years, I’ve finally found you again~"

"Ugh..." Ridan groaned, his smoky tail flicking in frustration. "This is harassment. I’m being spiritually assaulted."

"Be quiet and accept my love," Syaria hummed, arms still looped tightly around his waist.

Hazuki sighed and looked back at Ridan. "You could at least point me in the right direction."

"Yeah, yeah... just ask Ellyn," Ridan muttered, still swatting at Syaria’s hands like an annoyed cat. "She knows."

Hazuki frowned. "A kid like her wouldn’t know what Fire Grun is."

There was a pause.

Then—a sharp inhale.

"Kid!?" Ridan flinched, his ghostly eyes wide. "KID!?"

He glanced down at Hazuki, then up at Ellyn, then back at Hazuki. "She... she’s... ah—" H

Hazuki blinked. "She’s what?"

"Nothing!" Ridan blurted, turning away quickly. "Nothing important! Just... don’t underestimate beastkin, okay? They read weird books when they’re five or something."

Ellyn tilted her head, smiling sweetly. "Ara? Are you saying something strange about me, Mister Spirit?"

"Nope! Not at all!" Ridan said hurriedly, practically misting with nervousness.

Hazuki narrowed his eyes, suspicious. "That was a weird reaction."

"Just find the damn herb!" Ridan barked.

Ellyn’s playful smile softened. Her golden eyes briefly glinted—just for a blink—before subtly shifting into a deeper, glowing hue.

The Absolute Eye—activated.

She didn’t speak it aloud. No chant. No showy effect. Just a quiet blink and a ripple through her irises, unseen by Hazuki.

"Hmm..." she murmured, scanning the scorched terrain ahead.

Not far beyond them, waves of heat shimmered in the air, distorting the jagged black stones surrounding a bubbling lava pool. A few unstable ridges of cooled magma led toward it, and nestled right at the edge—unbothered by the intense heat—was a peculiar-looking herb.

It looked like a mushroom, but its surface sparkled with faint lightning arcs, crackling softly like a living storm. Interestingly, it didn’t burn, even though it was surrounded by molten rock.

Ellyn pointed delicately. "There’s your Fire Grun... Hazuki~"

"Where?" Hazuki squinted.

"There. Next to that lava pit," she said softly, her tone smooth. "See the one that looks like a mushroom but sparkles and glows?"

Hazuki’s eyes followed her finger. "Oh yeah. That one. Looks pretty cool."

"Wait—Hazuki—don’t just—!" Ridan started, alarmed, floating forward.

Ellyn blinked. "Hazuki, slowly—don’t just—!"

But it was too late.

Hazuki casually walked up, reached toward the lava pool as if he were picking a flower in a garden, and plucked the glowing Fire Grun in one smooth motion.

No burns. No magic backlash. Not even a shock.

He held it up, eyes wide. "Whoa... it’s glowing."

Ridan sighed, covering his face with his hand.

Ellyn and Syaria froze in place, completely stunned.

"H-Hazuki..." Ellyn stammered, still perched on his shoulder. "You... just touched it."

Hazuki looked at her, puzzled. "Yeah? Just a plant, right?"

Ridan muttered under his breath. "Yep... just a plant. A high-tier, unstable, mana-reactive elemental herb that explodes if you so much as breathe wrong near it."

Syaria blinked rapidly. "That thing’s supposed to react violently to heat and skin contact. I’ve seen mages use special enchanted tongs just to harvest it..."

Hazuki scratched his cheek. "Really? Huh. It felt kinda warm. That’s all."

"Kind of... warm?" Ellyn surprise.

Ridan stared blankly. "You... know what? I give up."

Hazuki just shrugged and casually plucked another glowing Fire Grun nearby, twirling it between his fingers. "So... how many of these do we need again?"

Hazuki casually dropped the second Fire Grun into his side leather bag, humming softly to himself.

Ellyn, still perched on his shoulder, narrowed her glowing eyes.

Then, her gaze flicked toward the floating spirit nearby.

(Ridan...)

The thought echoed clearly inside Ridan’s mind.

He blinked, startled by the sudden telepathic message.

(...Is it normal for him to do that?)

Ellyn’s voice stayed calm, but there was a sharp edge to it.

(Touching Fire Grun barehanded? No spell, no tool. Just... picked it up like a fruit.)

Ridan sighed, crossing his arms.

(Normal? Hah. You didn’t even see the poison swamp incident.)

(Poison swamp?)

(Yeah. Slipped right into a pool that could melt mithril. His clothes were gone. The guy climbed out buck-naked with nothing but his sword.)

Ellyn blinked slowly.

(...What?)

(Exactly. Then he strolled over and casually plucked two Chusi Flowers from the center of the swamp as if he was harvesting weeds in a garden. Didn’t even flinch.)

Ellyn’s brow furrowed. (No protective gear? No enchantments?)

(Nothing. Just stubbornness. And maybe a little insanity.)

Ellyn was silent for a moment.

(That’s not all,) Ridan added dryly.

(You should’ve seen him with the Hidun Grass.)

(The one that releases hallucination gas?)

(Exactly. First puff knocked him out cold. I thought he was done for. But then he just... woke up twenty minutes later, like he’d taken a nap. Wandered back over, picked a second one, inhaled again, nothing happened. Not even a cough.)

Ellyn slowly turned her head and glanced down at Hazuki, who was now crouched near another smoking ridge, poking at a glowing flower with the tip of his boot.

He yawned.

Ellyn’s voice in Ridan’s mind was softer now.

(...Has he ever wondered why?)

(Nope,) Ridan replied.

(He just thinks the world is weird.)

"(Now Princess Ellyna~)"

Ridan’s voice echoed slyly into her mind, full of amusement.

(Hmm?) Ellyn responded telepathically.

(How about you climb down and take Hazuki’s leather side bag for a moment?)

She blinked. (For what?)

(Just trust me.)

(...Oh. Okay.)

She looked down at Hazuki below her, her legs still dangling over his chest.

"Um, Hazuki?" she asked aloud, tapping his forehead with a finger.

"Yeah?" he replied, brushing aside a stray ember floating through the air.

"Can you let me down for a moment?"

Hazuki blinked. "Huh? Sure."

He crouched slightly and tilted sideways, letting her slide off gently to the ground. She landed softly beside him, brushing her skirt.

Hazuki tilted his head. "Everything alright?"

"Mhm." She smiled. "Just need to... check something."

"Give me that bag," Ellyn said, holding out her tiny hand.

Hazuki raised an eyebrow. "Hmm? For what?"

"Nothing," she said with a practiced innocent smile. "I just want to help by holding it."

He looked down at the worn leather side bag slung across his shoulder. "But I just got it adjusted... It’s already hanging nicely."

"Mou~ Just let me take it!" she puffed her cheeks, stepping closer and tugging lightly on the strap.

"Weird kid," Hazuki muttered.

"I’m a kid—but I’m also your fiancée!!" Ellyn blurted out, pointing a dramatic finger at him.

Hazuki blinked.

"...That doesn’t make it less weird," he said flatly.

In the distance, Ridan snorted—telepathically.

(Smooth. Really smooth, Princess Ellyna~)

(I panicked, okay!?) Ellyn snapped in her mind, cheeks reddening.

Syaria tilted her head at the two of them, floating over. "Ehh~ so young, and already having couple arguments. How cute~"

Hazuki groaned. "Not you too."

Ridan just floated smugly, arms crossed. "She has a point. What kind of fiancé doesn’t let his bride hold the bag?"

"I’m not even sure when this engagement started!" Hazuki snapped.

"The pinky promise~" Ellyn sang sweetly, already yanking the bag off his shoulder with suspicious ease.

"...You tricked me!!"

(Now, Princess... stop there and let Hazuki walk alone.)

Ridan’s voice echoed smugly in Ellyn’s mind.

(Ehhh!!??) Ellyn telepathed back, horrified.

(But look!! left and right, there’s bubbling lava pools everywhere! He’s going to die if he slips!)

(Just watch.) Ridan replied, annoyingly calm.

And then, as if on cue...

SPLASH!!

Hazuki’s foot slipped off a loose, blackened rock. He wobbled, flailing, and toppled sideways directly into a lava pool.

"HAZUKI!!" Ellyn screamed, eyes wide, clutching the leather bag tightly in her arms.

The lava bubbled, hissed, and sizzled.

No splash. No disturbance on the surface.

Just... boiling silence.

Seconds ticked by.

One...

Five...

Ten...

Thirty...

Almost a minute.

Ellyn’s face went pale as she dropped to her knees.

(He’s dead... He’s dead!!)

(My fiancé is dead! My pinky-promise partner is gone!)

Her mind spiraled into panic.

(That means—my divine protection is gone too! I’m vulnerable! They’ll come for me—those disgusting old men—trying to buy my hand in marriage! Or worse, using me for my skill transfer... My lips! My body—)

"GYAAAAHHH!!! IT’S HOT!!"

Hazuki suddenly shot out of the lava like a half-boiled radish.

Steam exploded around him as he climbed out, completely naked, hair dripping ,but perfectly fine.

"Damn! It’s like falling into an onsen that forgot to add the lukewarm water!" he shouted, flailing his arms.

He stood on the edge, pantsless and fuming. "Shit... there goes another set of clothes."

He looked over and spotted Ellyn, kneeling there still. "Oh. Good thing you held the bag. Nice catch."

Ridan floated beside him, face deadpan. "...And there he goes again."

( End Of Chapter )