I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality
Chapter 285 - 159: Rats Have Their Ways, Officials Have Their Thefts

Chapter 285: Chapter 159: Rats Have Their Ways, Officials Have Their Thefts

The mouse wedding, also called marriage of the mouse, mouse’s daughter getting married, or mouse getting a bride, is a widely spread folk belief.

As a result, many mouse-worshipping activities have emerged in folklore.

In the Jiangnan area, people often say that mice are harmful spirits and unlucky, so they need to be married off on the night of the thirtieth of the lunar calendar to ensure peace and prosperity for the coming year.

Further south, in some places, it’s said that when the mouse’s daughter is being married off, every household should fry sesame sugar, claiming it as wedding candy to ’celebrate the mouse’s marriage’.

As long as the mouse eats the wedding candy, it cannot come out to harm people anymore.

In some places, people perform ’blessing child witchcraft’ following the custom of the mouse’s daughter’s wedding.

The mouse is a ’child mouse’, implying it can bring offspring. Any family that practices blessing child witchcraft will make mouse-shaped buns when the mouse’s daughter is being married.

It’s said that as long as the new bride eats the tail of the mouse bun that year, she’ll get pregnant.

In Jin Sect, there is also a folk belief in the mouse wedding, but it usually takes place in January. Now, in such an off-season time, why would the demon mice in the grain storage hold a wedding?

Facing Xu Qing’s question, the leading team of big mice squeaked noisily.

The storehouse officer was curious and asked, "What are they saying? Could it be that you understand the language of beasts?"

Who’s the beast? Why are you insulting people!

Xu Qing turned his head, smiling and squinting at the storehouse officer, "These mice say their king is getting old and urgently needs to recruit a capable son-in-law to inherit this grain storage."

"Sir, if we wish to subdue these demon mice, we must first find a way to enter their mouse home."

"What do you plan to do?"

Seeing Xu Qing’s creepy smile, the storehouse officer looked around, seeming ready to call for help at the slightest sign of trouble.

Xu Qing reached out to grasp the storehouse officer’s sleeve, saying, "The important task of subduing the demon falls on your head, sir. You are the supervisor of this grain storage and obviously the most capable person here. As long as you are willing to marry the mouse king’s daughter, why fear not entering their home?"

"The mouse king might send a grand sedan chair to welcome you to the bridal chamber!"

"Who wants to go into the mouse hole?"

A gentleman doesn’t stand by a dangerous wall. The storehouse officer shook off Xu Qing’s sleeve and said, "I asked you to subdue the demons, not to use myself as bait. Besides, demon-subduing is your duty, not mine. Why should I put myself in danger?"

"You go subdue the demons yourselves. I’ll wait for you outside!"

Seeing that he finally got rid of the bothersome grain officer, Xu Qing was inwardly delighted.

"Sir, you are absolutely right. Just as the rooster tells time, the cat catches mice, and the dog guards the house, everyone should do their part. Since I accepted the task of dealing with the mice, it should be me to take care of it."

Watching a few big mice leading Xu Qing away, the storehouse officer still felt something was amiss.

Cats catch mice, dogs guard houses—wasn’t this an indirect way to call him a corrupt official?

Here, Xu Qing followed behind several big mice, with Xuan Yu and Guan Dazhuang flanking him closely.

The leading big mouse trembled, but didn’t dare to think of escaping at all.

With one stiff person and two cats, several mice zigzagged along the storage pathways and finally reached a disused storage room at the east side of the warehouse.

The big mouse chattered, saying that the mice here to welcome the groom couldn’t see cats, or they wouldn’t open the door to receive them.

Xu Qing looked around but didn’t see any so-called door.

After pondering for a moment, he asked Guan Dazhuang to stand guard outside.

Xuan Yu found it amusing but feared being sent away himself, so he raised his head, looked very seriously at Xu Qing, and said, "Those mice are tricky. Once you marry into their clan, they might not let you return."

Xu Qing laughed and said, "No matter how smart the mice are, they can’t outwit a cat. Why don’t you come with me, Xuan Yu, wouldn’t that be fine?"

Xuan Yu’s eyes lit up, but then he asked suspiciously, "What about the mice here to welcome the groom?"

In front of some big mice, Xu Qing opened his clothes, hinting for Xuan Yu to hide in his garments.

"..."

Xuan Yu stared at Xu Qing’s open chest, inside was a white undergarment and outside was the gaping clothes.

Upon seeing this, the big mice appeared slightly disappointed, but remembering the already sent away big cat, their thoughts started churning again.

Seeing Xuan Yu’s hesitation, Xu Qing coaxed him, "If you don’t hide, Xuan Yu, then you’ll have to guard the storage door."

As soon as Xu Qing finished speaking, he felt a touch softer than silk on his chest.

Xu Qing adjusted his collar. The black cat stuck its head out, its warm, furry head fitting snugly against Xu Qing’s neck and chin.

Pushing the exposed head of Xuan Yu back inside, Xu Qing’s pecs appeared particularly developed.

"Now there are no cats in sight. Hurry up and lead the way, and if any of you dare to harbor bad intentions..." As he spoke, Xu Qing tugged his chest open, and Xuan Yu cooperatively bared his fangs and hissed.

The big mouse’s fat trembled, and it could only obediently circle on the ground while squeaking.

After about three to five breaths, the compacted earth of the ground suddenly sunk like quicksand, and soon enough, a three-foot-wide hole appeared on the ground.

Feeling the demonic aura from the opening, Xu Qing was amazed.

Although these demon mice might not possess high levels of cultivation, their ability to construct a mouse home and alter the landscape was extraordinary.

At the entrance, an explorer carrying a small drum came out to scout. After a brief conversation with the mice beside Xu Qing, the explorer scurried back joyfully to report.

Xu Qing waited quietly, and after about half a cup of tea’s time, the three-foot-wide hole sank further, this time expanding to a size large enough to accommodate a sedan chair.

A group of dwarfish beings, painted with blush, narrow-faced and long-mouthed, dressed in human robes, came out from the hole to welcome them.

Seeing the welcoming procession in front of him, Xu Qing instinctively opened his Qi Observation Skill, immediately transforming those dwarfish figures into ash-gray and dark big mice.

These mice carried pots, pans, and dishes, escorting Xu Qing into the bridal sedan, knocking and drumming all the way, almost resembling a real human wedding ceremony. NovelFire

"The groom has arrived—"

"Please invite the lord-in-law into the residence."

Once the bridal sedan stopped, Xu Qing stepped down from it and saw an extensive mansion before him.

The mansion was built deep underground, with no sight of the sky above, dim and starless.

At the main entrance of the mansion, two red paper lanterns hung, and in the middle was a plaque with the gilded words "Gu Mansion."

Xu Qing followed the wedding procession into the mansion, and before entering the main hall, a cacophony of sounds reached his ears.

The guests and servants were using their hands to strike pots, bowls, and utensils, resembling the beating of gongs and drums.

Inside the hall, tables and chairs were being moved, and guests dressed in gray coats and black robes toasted and congratulated the master of the mansion sitting at the main seat.

"Congratulations on the new son-in-law!"

"Gu Zixu, this is a joyful occasion..."

Xu Qing glanced toward the main seat, seeing an old man in white clothes and a white hat, with white bushy brows, sitting there glowing with health and vigor.

"Please, have the lord-in-law take a seat!"

A pair of black-faced young attendants guided Xu Qing to a seat.

On the table were a bowl of raw rice, a basin of white flour, a plate of peanuts, and some millet grain, presenting a diverse and abundant spread.

A guest came forward to propose a toast.

"Since you have won Gu Zixu’s favor, you must have some skills. Today is an auspicious day. Why don’t you show us a few tricks and win us over?"

Xu Qing looked at the middle-aged man in a scholar’s cap and robe, chuckling, "Quite right, since it’s a day of great joy, I should give the host some face."

As he spoke, Xu Qing had a servant bring a stone, then he chanted an incantation, performing a spell to transform earth into gold, turning everything into gold.

After reciting the spell, Xu Qing pointed at the stone, and the plain stone suddenly gleamed brightly, turning into dazzling gold.

"Impressive skills! Gu Zixu, your eye for talent is exceptional. With such ability, he certainly deserves to be a fine son-in-law of the Gu Mansion!" View the correct content at NovelFire

After saying this, the middle-aged man in the scholar’s robe bowed and left his seat.

From the side, whispers arose: "Luo Gongzi has been fond of Miss Gu for a long time, but now, the new son-in-law has taken her away."

"Luo Gongzi can only bring wealth, but he can’t transform stone into gold like the lord-in-law..."

At the main seat, Gu Zixu’s smile grew warmer. He gestured for a servant and whispered a few words.

Soon, a bride with a vermilion veil, dressed in white garments, was escorted to the hall by the servants.

Xu Qing watched the graceful, flowing figure of the bride approach with a bigger smile.

Standing up and approaching the main seat, Xu Qing, holding a tray, spoke to Gu Zixu, "Father-in-law, I have a gift to present."

This child is good, so polite!

"My dear son-in-law, you are kind." Gu Zixu stroked his beard, nodding, then looked curiously at the empty tray in Xu Qing’s hands, "What is the gift?"

Xu Qing smiled slightly, holding the tray to his chest. With his other hand, he reached into his robe and pulled at his garment!

A black cat with an arched back, huffing, jumped onto the tray.

Dear! On this joyous day, how can a cat come to disrupt the wedding!

The hall filled with the sounds of pots, pans, and utensils being overturned, tables and chairs clumsily knocked over.

Xu Qing glanced aside and saw those guests and servants, who seemed human, suddenly transform into large black rats, scurrying out of the hall.

In the blink of an eye, only a few shivering giant rats, a few servants, Gu Zixu, and the unnamed bride remained in the hall.

Gu Zixu’s eyelids twitched violently as the black cat’s gaze locked onto him, a feeling of inexplicable fear creeping into his heart.

Xu Qing calmly pulled a chair to sit down, knowing that catching the leader is crucial, while Guan Dazhuang guarded the ground, preventing the smaller rats and demons from escaping this underground lair.

With the tray on his lap, Xu Qing calmly began:

"Do you know why I’m here?"

Gu Zixu exhaled, saying, "You were invited by the grain officer to capture me, the mage of the Cat Immortal Hall."

"Oh?" Xu Qing raised an eyebrow, "Did you know this before the wedding, or are you just guessing now?"

Gu Zixu avoiding the question, "I’ve long heard of the Cat Immortal Hall’s great name. My skills can’t match it. If it targets me, the rats I protect will never find peace again."

"If you don’t mind, I’m genuinely willing to form a family bond with you."

"..."

Xu Qing calming the restless Xuan Yu, smiled, "Stealing official grain, you can’t avoid death. Do you hope to bribe me with wealth and beauty? I’m human; how could I ally with rats?"

Gu Zixu frowned, "Stealing official grain? Do you know why I committed theft knowing it was a crime?"

Xu Qing felt a shift in mood, listening quietly.

"I was once an immortal. These years, with constant natural disasters and human calamities, the Imperial Court set up relief warehouses at Jin Sect. For that reason, I forbade the rats from approaching the grain storage warehouse."

"In the world, where have grain warehouses not been plagued by rats? But in the past two years, Jin Sect hasn’t seen a single rat calamity!"

"Yet when it was time to open the warehouse for the increasing refugees, the grain officer claimed Jinmen Grain Storage had a rat calamity, not to mention relief grains; even other warehouse grains were largely ruined by the rats..."

"Without grain, they couldn’t open the warehouse for relief, and my hall became a despised nuisance, hunted by everyone."

"At that time, the people tore down my temple, and I lost all incense offerings. Why do you think I came here to steal from the grain warehouse?"

Hearing this, Xu Qing was taken aback. What is this?