Dragged to Another World… and I Took the Goddess with me!
Chapter 43: Hazaa! …Oh God My Spleen!

Chapter 43: Hazaa! ...Oh God My Spleen!

Finn lay sprawled across the wreckage of the shattered table, tears in his eyes, regretting every life choice that led to this moment. His spine screamed. His ribs whined. And his ass...

His ass felt like it had just been railed by two angry gorillas on steroids.

"Ughh..." he groaned, curling slightly. "I should’ve just studied accounting..."

He was pretty sure he’d broken at least one bone. Maybe two. Possibly his soul.

But hey—on the bright side?

Ezgar was knocked out. Flat on his back, eyes rolled up, out cold like a kid who ate three melatonin gummies by accident.

Finn slowly started pushing himself up using a jagged piece of the table as a cane. He winced, groaning with every movement. His ass throbbed with the fury of a thousand betrayed ancestors.

Still... there was one more thing left to do.

Find Beard Man.

He glanced across the wizard tower’s war zone. Shockingly, things were calming down.

Most of the demons were either fleeing or already face-down in magical rubble. A few stragglers skittered away from the relentless barrage of blue beams as the wizards pressed their advantage.

Finn finally managed to stand on his own two feet. He immediately clutched his butt again and winced.

"My life is completely shit," he mumbled.

And then—

RUMBLE.

The ground trembled beneath him.

"Oh, come on," Finn whispered.

He turned toward the sound, already dreading what he’d see.

And sure enough...

Celemothy.

The giant flaming demon chicken.

Still alive. Still pissed. Still built like a steroidal Thanksgiving dinner from hell.

Finn’s jaw dropped. He made a noise so pitiful it could only be described as "a dying grandma sigh."

The monstrous bird stirred, its massive wings flexing as flames rippled across its feathers. It rose from the rubble like a boss from a Souls game, beady glowing eyes scanning the tower.

And then—one brave soul stepped forward.

It was the one wizard that Finn had tripped twice earlier.

Now revealed, finally, in his moment of glory.

He dramatically unsheathed his wand, twirled it, and pointed it at the chicken like some budget anime protagonist.

"I—Ezan, Guardian of this great tower—shall not let you threaten the lives of my fellow wizard-men any longer!"

The other wizards gasped in awe. Some cheered. One even whispered, "He’s doing it...!"

Meanwhile, Finn stared, deadpan.

’Didn’t I trip this clown like... twice?’

Ezan twirled his wand dramatically. "Hazaa!"

Celemothy clucked in Latin—yes, Latin—and lunged.

PECK.

PECK. PECK PECK PECK.

Ezan screamed in agony as the chicken violently pecked him into the stone floor. The ground cracked beneath him with every merciless jab. Feathers and magical blood flew.

"AHHHHH! AAAAAAAHHHHH!!"

The other wizards gasped, horrified.

Finn’s jaw dropped again. ’Okay I did not expect that. Holy shit.’

"HELP ME—!" Ezan screamed, his wand sparking uselessly as he flailed under the bird’s wrath.

Finally, the other wizards snapped out of it and began firing their blue beams like crazy. Magic blasts tore through the air, lighting up the tower again as the final boss battle kicked into full swing.

And Finn?

Still grabbing his sore ass, watching from the sidelines, muttered:

"Can’t this thing just die already..."

Celemothy stopped pecking Ezan—who now looked like a crushed tomato smeared on a stone canvas—and slowly turned its attention to the rest of the wizard-men.

And then the carnage began.

One poor wizard got snatched mid-air by the beak and slammed into the ground like a ragdoll. Another screamed as the chicken yeeted him straight into the bookshelves, splinters and spellbooks raining down like confetti.

In other words—

Celemothy was absolutely rocking their shit.

Finn backed away slowly, eyes wide in sheer horror. Who could blame him?

He was witnessing a giant, demonic, Latin-clucking chicken absolutely obliterate every robed nerd in sight.

Then... it noticed him.

Finn froze.

The two locked eyes.

The only word that echoed through his mind:

"Shitttt."

Celemothy dropped the dangling wizard like expired lunch meat. It huffed through its nostrils like a bull. Its red eyes glowed. Its talons scratched the stone floor.

Then it spotted Ezgar, unconscious and broken on the table nearby.

The chicken clucked ominously in Latin again—something that probably translated to "I will feast on your soul"—and charged.

"FUCK ME, NOT AGAIN!" Finn yelled, clutching his butt cheeks like he was trying to hold in his last shred of dignity, and bolted.

The thunderous stomps grew louder behind him. Finn could feel the air pressure shift as the demonic bird bore down on him. He screamed again—high-pitched, shrill, and very, very feminine.

He reached the bookshelves and spun around fast, ready to face death one last time—

And nearly crapped himself when he saw Celemothy already mid-lunge.

"DAMN IT!"

Instinct kicked in.

Finn flung his hand forward, then yanked it back.

Trip.

The chicken’s foot caught on absolutely nothing—because that’s how the Trip God worked—and it let out a shocked qback as its massive body faceplanted into the bookshelves.

The whole structure exploded in a cloud of paper and wood.

Finn let out a dying squeal beneath it, staring up at the beak mere inches from his face before he rolled away and scrambled to safety.

"WHY IS MY LIFE LIKE THIS!?" he shouted as he ran.

The wizards noticed.

"He distracted the chicken!" one shouted. "Zero-mana loser boy did something useful!" yelled another.

"Fire upon it!"

"Screw you assholes!!" Finn shouted back mid-sprint.

The wizard squad unleashed hell. Blue beams rained from every direction, blasting into Celemothy’s flame-feathered ass like it owed them rent.

The monstrous bird screeched, its clucks now sounding more like dying Gregorian chants. It flailed, wings flapping, head spinning, as it stumbled back from the assault.

It hit the wall hard.

THOOM.

Then tumbled into the center of the room—charred, dazed, twitching.

Still alive. But not for long.

It was time.

Time to put this damn bird down.

Once and for all.

Hopefully.

But then—

A voice boomed from above.

Loud.

Commanding.

Absolutely, violently pissed.

"YOU PIECE OF DEMONIC SHIT! I WILL SEND YOU INTO THE AFTERLIFE!"

Finn froze and looked up.

His eyes widened like a guy realizing he’d accidentally hit "Reply All."

Oh yeah.

It was over.

This battle?

Officially about to end.