Dragged to Another World… and I Took the Goddess with me!
Chapter 42: Wiggles Ultimate Take Down™

Chapter 42: Wiggles Ultimate Take Down™

Finn stood slumped over the tripped demon, staring ahead at something so absurd it broke his brain a little.

Wizards were flying and flailing, blue beams zapping in every direction like a magical laser tag arena. Demons were barreling into them with bloodthirsty grunts, fists swinging and horns gleaming.

Celemothy, the giant flying chicken, lay face-down in the rubble like it had seen God and regretted it.

"Aghh, you’ll pay for tha—"

Slam.

The same blue demon tried to rise, but Finn tripped him again without a word, planting his foot firmly on the back of the demon’s skull like he was asserting dominance over a wet mop.

Finn slapped his cheeks with both hands, then dragged his palms down his face like a war-weary anime protagonist. "Let’s do this," he muttered.

Just before taking off, he stomped the demon’s head.

Once.

Twice.

Three times.

For extra precaution.

Then he sprinted straight into the chaos.

A blue beam zipped right past him, slamming into a red demon and launching the poor bastard into a table that exploded if it were poorly made. Probably was.

"Holy shit!" Finn yelped, stumbling sideways.

To his right, he spotted a red demon strangling a wizard mid-air like it was wrestling match. The wizard flailed helplessly, choking out high-pitched gasps.

Finn dashed over and pointed at the demon. "HEY, UGLY!"

"What?!—You—YOU?!"

Thud.

The demon dropped instantly, face smacking the floor with the grace of a falling fridge.

The wizard gasped in disbelief. "It’s—It’s you!"

"Yeah, yeah—blast him already!"

"R-Right!" The wizard yanked his wand and unloaded five rapid shots into the demon’s body like he was trying to win a carnival game.

"Now go help your wizard buddies before they get turned into ash."

The wizard nodded furiously and took off, leaving Finn grinning in the middle of the war-torn library like some discount action hero with a gag spell and an awful perverted mindset.

Finn kept moving, helping any wizard he saw struggling not to get gutted. He wasn’t exactly thrilled about it—these snooty spell-flingers had insulted him earlier—but he wasn’t about to sit back and let them get slaughtered either.

Even Finn had a line. And demons? Especially ones who messed with the girls?

Yeah, they could choke.

By the time he finished helping a fourth wizard (who didn’t even say thank you, the prick), Finn jogged back to the center of the battlefield. The chaos was still rampant—beams flying, tables on fire, someone screaming in a random cursed language—but the tide was starting to turn. Thanks, of course, to him.

Finn stood in the middle of the open floor, scanning for anyone else in need—until he heard it:

"You rot-nosed bastard!"

His head whipped toward the voice.

There stood Ezgar.

Alive. Pissed. And somehow even uglier than before.

He was battered, armor cracked, face bruised, but still swinging that half-broken sword like he was hot shit. And naturally, he was standing atop Celemothy like a dramatic warlord on his dying steed.

"You will pay for all that you did!" Ezgar snarled, pointing the mangled blade at Finn.

Just then, a wizard fired a blue beam at him—Ezgar batted it away with a backhanded deflection. The spell ricocheted, slammed into the poor wizard, and sent him plummeting out of the air like a shot-down pigeon.

Finn blinked. ’Damn. He is not playing.’

Ezgar began his descent, sliding down the chicken’s back with ridiculous anime-villain flair.

Finn immediately extended his arm to trip him—

But nothing happened.

[Error: Target is too far to be tripped. User must trip five more opponents in order to trip enemies at a greater distance.]

Finn bit his lip. ’Damn it! Why NOW of all times?!’

Ezgar hit the ground and started closing the distance fast, stomping over books and cracked tile like a man with a grudge and zero brain cells.

"You will pay for everything, bastard!"

Finn raised his fists, heart thumping.

There was nowhere to run now.

Celemothy lay unconscious.

The wizards were busy.

And so began... the legendary, deeply unnecessary, one-on-one duel.

Ezgar charged at Finn, sword raised high like he was about to land the finishing blow in a JRPG cutscene.

Finn narrowed his eyes, locking in on his movements like some seasoned warrior.

If there was one thing Finn knew about fighting, it was that he was very good at it. (A lie.) He once fought four people at once and totally dominated! (He got his ass absolutely folded.) But this was just one guy with a sword. Piece of cake.

Finn planted his foot to the ground, inhaled deeply like a kung fu master—

Then spun 180 degrees and booked it.

’Yeah nope! I am NOT dying today!’ he screamed in his mind, sprinting like a terrified toddler running from an abusive dad.

"You coward!" Ezgar shouted behind him, giving chase.

Finn’s legs pounded against the stone floor until—crap. Dead end.

Bookcases. Huge ones. Only left or right... and either way, Ezgar would catch up.

So naturally, Finn started climbing the bookshelves.

’Oh God, it’s a horror game! It’s a horror game!’ His thoughts raced as fast as his hands. ’Climb faster, you idiot! This is just like Resident Villains! Except I’m the girl!’

Ezgar reached the base and snarled before beginning to climb as well.

Finn dared a glance down—

His heart skipped a beat. He screamed like a banshee.

"AAAAAHHHHHH!!"

Ezgar paused, staring up at him with the most what-the-actual-hell face possible.

This was the same man who’d flown in on a demonic chicken, wiped out most of his soldiers, and crashed it into a wizard tower like a feathered missile...

Now screeching like a toddler on a jungle gym.

Ezgar couldn’t help it. He laughed.

"Time’s running out, you rot-nosed freak! Let go and die already!"

But Finn had reached a good height.

A very fall-and-break-your-tailbone type of height.

Then he saw it.

A table.

Perfectly placed.

And suddenly... Finn remembered something.

Something deep in his soul.

A childhood dream.

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath...

Ezgar raised a brow. "Giving up already? Finally accepting your fate—"

And Finn let go.

Ezgar’s eyes went wide as Finn grabbed both his horns mid-fall.

"What are you—?!"

"You’re about to receive the Wiggles Ultimate Take Down™!"

Finn pulled hard, using Ezgar as a grappling anchor as they both plummeted downward.

He aimed. He positioned.

He was going to do it.

His childhood dream.

A full-on, half-assed RKO.

CRASH!

Ezgar landed spine-first on the table.

Finn landed with him—full weight, zero grace.

And then:

"AWWWWOUGHHHHH!!!" Finn screamed in pure, unfiltered pain.

Turns out? Doing wrestling moves from childhood dreams onto a real person using a real table?

Stupid. Insanely stupid.

Top ten on the Dumbass Finn List™.

But Ezgar?

Out cold.

And the table?

Obliterated.

And Finn’s ass?

Destroyed. Absolutely cooked.

And more hell would only follow shortly after.