Alpha Damon's Greatest Regret
Chapter 38- Therapy Session

Chapter 38: Chapter 38- Therapy Session

DAMON~

Two days had passed and her words remained persistent in my head, playing on a continuous loop.

’Do you know what it means to be Damon?’

’It’s a title.’

’Do you think it’s normal?’, How dare she speak as if she knew me as if she knew anything about what it meant to be in my position, the alpha was more than just a title and I was wrong to even consider talking to a human about things they obviously would never understand.

"Alpha," Carlos said as he walked into my office, I looked up at him.

"Hey," I replied.

"Here is the list of low ranks whose promotions have been continuously postponed." He said as he passed me a folder, I opened the folder and deeply exhaled, there were so many names.

"They are so many."

"You don’t have to do this you know, I get something can’t change," Carlos said.

"No, I told you I’d do my best and even if I didn’t, this person deserves to be rewarded for their hard work.", He smiled at me.

"Re-arrange this list, make it in terms of year of service, type of service, and overall efficiency, and make it the top 50, the rest will have to come later," I explained, he nodded as he carried the file and began walking out.

"Carlos!" I called out as he got to the door, he turned around.

"Yes"

"Apart from being the Alpha, what else do you know about me?"

"You’re a father of two sons, you aspire to be like your father, you’re strong but you have a kind heart which only adds to your strength, you are a man among men" He answered with his eyes fixed on me.

"Thank you," I said and he nodded and left the office, to an outsider maybe what Carlos had just said would have sounded wonderful but every single one of the things he listed are simply traits of an alpha.

After finishing all the things that needed to be done for the day it was time to turn in, I locked up the office and was about to head home when I spotted Daniel walking down the hall and approaching me.

"Damon!" He called out as he walked to my side.

"Yes," I answered hesitantly, wanting to get home and rest as soon as possible.

"New reports on silver hollows movement," Daniel said and the fatigue immediately left my body.

"What are they up to?" I asked, urgency filling my voice.

"They are moving towards GreyFure."

"Why would they be heading there?"

"We don’t know the reason for the sudden movement, our scouts just saw silver hollow troops marching towards GreyFure."

"I guess we can ignore them as far as they aren’t coming towards us." I said, my mind relaxing a little "That being said, make sure the scouts stay vigilant, I don’t think Simon does things without a clear objective in mind." I explained.

"Sure." He said and began walking away from me.

"Wait!" I called stopping him, he turned around and faced me.

"Anything else?" He asked, I stared at him for a while before I finally asked.

"Have you ever seen me do anything that wasn’t related to being an Alpha?", his eyes danced around his head did a while before he finally answered.

"Apart from having a family, No." He said bluntly "Is that all?"

"Yeah," I said, letting him get back to doing whatever it was he was doing, as I watched him walk away I began to rethink the words she had told me.

’Who would I be if I wasn’t the alpha?’ I asked myself over and over again and there was never an answer, why?

When I was a kid, I watched my dad and all I could think of was how much I wanted to be the Alpha but when my father passed it stopped being a choice and began my obligation to the pack, I had never given it a thought not until my conversation with Dr Anita at least. Was she right?, If I stopped being the Alpha would I be anything else, The more I thought about it the more I realized how much it actually bothered me, I felt my hands begin to shake, was I me or the blueprint of my father, was Damon an actual person or just a vessel for the position of the ’Alpha’. Before I knew it I was standing at the door of her office again, with my knuckles ready to alert her of my presence but I froze, my mind at war with my body as I thought about the implications of going into that room again, was I ready to open a door that had never been opened, I wasn’t, I turned around and was about to leave when I heard the faint creak of the door opening behind me.

"Damon." she said recognizing me even though I wasn’t facing her "Are you back or you just came to see my door." She joked, slowly I turned around and looked at her.

"I’m not sure."

"Come in, Let’s find out then."

"I wanna come in but I’m scared if I open that door I’ll never be able to close it."

"That’s the thing about working on yourself, it’s hard, it’s not easy to truly admit you have flaws but once you do the rest starts to feel a lot easier."

"What If I can’t get better?"

"Everyone can get better Damon." I took in a deep sharp breath before I looked back at her.

"I don’t want to open that door," I said calmly but there was a faint element of fear present in my voice as I spoke.

"Exploring yourself can be scary but you can’t improve on something you don’t yet understand" she replied.

"What if we open that door and it gets worse?" I said.

"It won’t," She said her voice calming my nerves as she stepped back into her office and stretched her palm towards me "Let’s start your therapy session."