The lost mate
Chapter 32: Lingering regrets

Chapter 32: Lingering regrets

"So, you are going back ?" Annie repeated.

"I am not going home. I am just going to Skagway. I need to sign some papers for the mines I am buying. I will be back in a few days."

"Right." Annie sipped her drink. So she had a window of those days when Damien would be away. She would escape then.

For five years, she had felt like a piece of herself was missing. She had tried to ignore it, tried to deny it, but deep down, she knew the truth. She missed him. He was right—they were mates. A mate she didn’t want, with whom she had a child.

Annie’s emotions were a storm she could no longer contain. The thought of possibly never seeing Damien again stirred a deep sorrow. It was a moment she felt compelled to remember, to hold on to, even as it threatened to overwhelm her.

She finished her drink in one long gulp, savouring the burn of the whiskey. Damien, raised an eyebrow as he watched her. "Do you want another?" he asked.

Annie nodded, more than ready for the comforting numbness the alcohol offered. She watched as Damien signalling the bartender for another round, the clinking of glasses and low murmur of the bar providing a comforting backdrop to their conversation.

When the drinks arrived, Annie didn’t waste time. She sipped and then drank quickly, trying to dull the ache in her heart. Damien, clearly noting her state, reached across the table and placed a steadying hand on hers. "I’ll drop you home," he said, his voice firm yet gentle. "It’ll make me feel better."

Annie hesitated, her thoughts muddled by the alcohol. She tried to protest, "It’s not necessary, Damien. I can manage on my own."

But Damien’s resolve was unyielding. "Please, Annie. Just let me do this." She could see the concern in his eyes. She could hardly refuse him when he looked at her like that.

They made their way to the lift, Damien’s arm occasionally brushing against hers for reassurance. As they entered, the confined space seemed to close in on Annie, the alcohol making her unsteady. She staggered slightly, her balance wavering.

Damien was quick to react. His strong arms caught her before she could fall, pulling her gently against him. "Careful there," he murmured, his voice a soft rumble that vibrated through her.

Annie looked up at him, her vision a bit blurry but the warmth of his embrace unmistakable. "Thanks," she said, her voice barely a whisper. She was acutely aware of the way his body felt against hers and the strength and security he provided.

His gaze was fixed on her face. She moved her body forward. The gap between them closed.

Fear had been ruling her life for way too long.

She stood on tiptoe and pressed her lips to his. He tasted like the liquor they had been drinking. She sucked on his lips, loving the plump firmness of them. Damm ! It had been so long. So long since she had felt those lips.

His one hand slid up to cradle the back of her head and pressed her face more firmly against his. His lips parted, and his tongue darted into her mouth. Flicking at it tentatively, and then he devoured her, taking possession of her mouth as if he were trying to suck the breath out of her body. Annie’s knees weakened, and she slumped into him. He tapped the lift’s keypad, and it changed its course. He scooped her in his arms, carrying her effortlessly as they continued their passionate kiss. Annie wondered where they were going, but then realised that she didn’t really care. She focused on kissing him back with the same ferocity as him.

He broke the kiss only when her back touched the soft, king sized bed. He perched himself on the edge so that he was looking down at her. He reached out and began to run his hands over her body. His fingers ran lightly down her face, tracing the groves of her flushed cheekbones, her eyelids, and kiss-swollen lips. He cupped her chin in his palm, kissed hungrily on her lips for another moment, and then his hands ran down her shoulders, her bare arms, tracing the outlines of her collarbones. He worked his way down until he was cupping her breasts with both hands through the thin satin of her blouse. His hands begin to massage and knead her breasts with a tender ferocity that continues to send shockwaves down between her legs, which had fallen apart on their own.

"God ! I missed you." He muttered while kissing her neck.

But now memories of the last time when he had touched her began to crowd her consciousness. She remembers how she felt the last time they had been together. Her stomach clenched, and a cold chill extinguished the pleasure that had been igniting her nerve endings. She froze beneath Damien. Her mind raced with conflicting emotions as she tried to push away the haunting memories. Damien’s touch, once comforting, now felt suffocating.

"What’s the matter?" He murmured, his hands still caressing her breasts. He kissed her again.

She didn’t speak. His hands stopped moving. He looked at her more closely. "Are you ok?"

"I’m sorry," she says. "I’m being stupid. I’m not ready for this. I shouldn’t be here." She tried to get up, but he pushed her back down gently.

"But I thought we were—" He pauses, "Connecting. Have I done something to scare you?"

"No, it’s my fault. I’m sorry. I’ll go." Again, she tried to get up, but he was still above her, still

looking down at her with questions in his dangerous eyes.

"Are you afraid because of the last time ?"

She closed her eyes, feeling overwhelmed by memories of the past. "Yes," she whispered, tears welling up in her eyes. He reached out and held her hand gently, understanding dawning in his expression as he realised the depth of her fear.

"I always regretted it because it was too quick; I don’t remember much about it because I was in a daze. I barely have any memories of our first time. But I won’t stop you if you are not ready." His voice was so low, it was as if he was talking to himself.

Annie felt a pang of guilt; was she wrong in blaming everything in him and running away ?

"Do you still want this?" he asked, unaware of her turmoil.

She thought for a few seconds about it. A part of her was screaming that she should say no. But her wolf urged her to consider giving him another chance.

The wolf won.

"Yes," and she reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling his lips down to hers, blotting out the past.