The Lazy Chronicles: Apartment of the Apocalypse
Chapter 41: The Blobfather Takes the Stage

Chapter 41: Chapter 41: The Blobfather Takes the Stage

Life in the apocalypse was far from boring, especially when you had a glowing gelatinous blob as your de facto leader. Blinky’s fame was spreading faster than Mallory could eat a bag of chips. Survivors, raiders, and even rival factions began whispering about the "Blobfather" and his army of gooey minions.

Mallory, of course, reveled in the attention.

"I mean, when was the last time someone called you a legend?" she asked Vanessa one afternoon, lounging on the couch with a soda in hand.

Vanessa, busy sharpening a knife, didn’t even look up. "When I single-handedly took down three zombies in the alley last week. Remember?"

Mallory waved a hand dismissively. "Pfft. That’s just survival stuff. This"—she gestured dramatically at Blinky, who was perched on the coffee table like a gelatinous king—"is branding. We’re becoming icons."

Zara snorted from her spot near the balcony. "Yeah, icons of insanity."

---

The group’s growing reputation brought with it a new set of challenges. The latest came in the form of a messenger—a scrappy-looking teenager who showed up on their doorstep, panting and clutching a piece of paper like his life depended on it.

"Uh... hi?" Mallory said, opening the door.

The boy thrust the paper at her without a word.

Mallory frowned, unfolding it. The letter was scrawled in messy handwriting:

HELP NEEDED. WILL PAY IN FOOD, MEDICINE, AND FUEL. RAIDERS HAVE TAKEN OUR SUPPLY CACHE. LOCATION MARKED BELOW.

"Wow, super detailed," Mallory said, raising an eyebrow.

"It’s not a joke," the boy said, catching his breath. "They’re desperate. The raiders are too strong for us to handle, but everyone’s heard about... you know, him."

The boy’s eyes flicked nervously to Blinky, who was glowing faintly on the counter.

Mallory grinned. "Oh, you mean the Blobfather? Yeah, he’s pretty great."

Vanessa snatched the note out of Mallory’s hands. "This could be a trap."

"Or it could be an opportunity," Altair countered.

"To what? Get killed?" Zara asked, crossing her arms.

"To solidify our influence," Altair said. "If people see that we’re willing to help, they’ll be more likely to ally with us in the future."

Mallory shrugged. "I’m in. What’s the worst that could happen?"

Vanessa gave her a flat look. "You want the short list or the long one?"

---

The location marked on the map wasn’t far, but it required venturing outside the safety of the apartment—a prospect that Mallory found less than appealing.

"Do I have to go?" she whined as she packed a bag.

"Yes," Vanessa said firmly. "You’re the only one who can control Blinky and his minions."

Mallory sighed dramatically. "Fine. But if I die, I’m haunting you forever."

The group set out at dawn, armed to the teeth and accompanied by Blinky and a small contingent of his minions. The streets were eerily quiet, the usual groans of zombies replaced by an oppressive silence.

"I don’t like this," Zara muttered, gripping her bat tightly.

"Relax," Mallory said. "We’ve got the Blobfather on our side. What could go wrong?"

Altair shot her a skeptical look. "You really need to stop saying things like that."

---

When they reached the supply cache, it was clear why the survivors had called for help. The raiders’ stronghold was a veritable fortress, complete with high walls, barbed wire, and guards armed with makeshift weapons.

"Okay, so... maybe this is a little intimidating," Mallory admitted, peering through a pair of binoculars.

Vanessa frowned. "We’ll need a distraction to get inside."

"I’ve got an idea," Mallory said, a mischievous grin spreading across her face.

The group groaned in unison.

---

Mallory’s plan was as ridiculous as it was effective. She sent Blinky and the minions ahead, armed with nothing but their natural glow and a few random objects they’d picked up along the way.

The raiders, already on edge from the eerie silence of the apocalypse, were not prepared for an army of glowing blobs to appear out of nowhere.

"What the hell is that?!" one guard shouted, pointing at the approaching minions.

Another guard squinted. "Looks like... jellyfish?"

The minions chirped and screeched, their glowing eyes darting around as they zigzagged toward the fortress. One of them launched itself onto a guard’s leg, sending him into a panicked frenzy.

"Get it off! Get it off!" he yelled, flailing wildly.

Meanwhile, Mallory and the others used the chaos to slip inside the fortress.

"This is insane," Vanessa whispered as they crept through the shadows.

"That’s why it’s working," Mallory whispered back, grinning.

---

The group made it to the supply room without incident, only to find it guarded by a burly raider with a face that looked like it had been introduced to one too many fists.

"Well, well," he said, cracking his knuckles. "Looks like we’ve got some uninvited guests."

Mallory stepped forward, holding up her hands. "Hey, big guy. Let’s talk about this."

The raider sneered. "Talk? You think I’m gonna let you walk out of here with our stuff?"

Mallory shrugged. "Not exactly."

Before the raider could react, Blinky launched himself from Mallory’s shoulder, landing squarely on the man’s face.

"AHHHH!" the raider screamed, stumbling backward as Blinky’s glow intensified.

The minions swarmed in, chirping and nipping at the man’s ankles until he collapsed in a heap.

"Good job, team!" Mallory said, giving Blinky a thumbs-up.

Vanessa sighed. "You’re unbelievable."

---

With the supplies secured and the raiders thoroughly humiliated, the group returned to the survivors’ camp as heroes. Raven greeted them with a smirk.

"Looks like the Blobfather strikes again," she said.

Mallory grinned. "What can I say? We aim to please."

As they unloaded the supplies, Mallory couldn’t help but feel a sense of accomplishment. For the first time since the apocalypse began, she wasn’t just surviving—she was making a difference.

And maybe, just maybe, she was starting to enjoy it.

---

As night fell, the group returned to the apartment, exhausted but triumphant. Blinky settled into his usual spot on the counter, glowing softly as the minions chirped around him.

Mallory flopped onto the couch, grabbing a bag of chips.

"Well," she said, grinning at the others, "who’s ready for our next adventure?"

Vanessa groaned. "I hate you."

Zara laughed. "You love her."

Mallory winked. "You both do. Admit it."