The Greatest Sin [Progression Fantasy][Kingdom Building]
Chapter 384 – Waking Up To Death

Unity is a funny word. I do not care for it in the traditional sense in the slightest. I make no attempt to stall argument or accommodate people in any way I myself would not be accommodated. It is not that I feel myself exempt to special exceptions because of my status, there is no reason for Divines to lie about themselves in order to pretend that they are somehow on par with humans. They are not, they are not supposed to be in the first place and anyone who pretend they see equality between Divines, much less between Divines and mortals, is simply deluded and wilfully wrong. But rather, it is that exceptions are below me. A true Divine should be able to withstand anything, defeat anything and inspire everything.

Everyone under me is united, however I do not enforce it. I do not celebrate or uphold petty differences of opinion, but petty differences of opinion are as real and as definite in this world as the sun rising in the morning. It is simply something that will not be defeated, no matter how much one tries to fight against it. At the end of the day, men may disagree with me but I am still the God of Pride. However these debates of policy, of politics and of prudence I only allow from within and when they are kept between the various relevant parties.

The image of disunity is intolerable. The confidence a united, decisive and forward aiming front inspires only exists because the idea that it can be disunited is simply scoffed at, it is not even debated. Any agreement with the opponent is intolerable, any step back is a moral defeat in the same fashion that a battle lost is a material defeat.

- Excerpt from God Arascus’, of Pride’s, private writings.

Kavaa opened her eyes and blinked as she fought off the bouts of grogginess that came from passing out. She felt the gears in her mind slowly, twist and grind their way into speeding up as she yawned and felt her back creak. Her spine hurt and her muscles were sore. Everything was sore actually. Her fingers and toes felt as if they were being stabbed by hundreds of thousands of tiny needles, her heart was beating slowly, her stomach felt as if it was a hole in her body. Her ears were dull, her vision was dulled, her mouth was dry. Her hair felt thin. She felt disgusting. So this is what losing consciousness felt like. Wait.

She had lost consciousness.

Kavaa sat up immediately, felt her head touch stone and crashed back down, this time banging the back of her head on stone. “Ahhh…” The Goddess of Health moaned as she took a breath and felt a cold hand touch her forehead. It was a cold hand, unnaturally so, Neneria somehow managed to recognize it even though her mind refused to place it. Kavaa questioned it for a moment before her mind returned to the original problem she had. How did the Goddess of Health manage to lose consciousness? What had happened?

“Did you sleep well?” Someone asked as Kavaa took a deep breath.

“What is happening?” Kavaa asked, she tried saying those words, although whether it was mouth or her ears that failed, they sounded like a garbled mess of vowels and odd syllables.

“You ran out of energy.” Kavaa finally placed the voice as Neneria’s cold tone. Kavaa realised this was simply her natural tone and she always sounded so terribly disinterested. It could be annoying but right, with the woman sounding as if this was just another day for her, it was exactly what Kavaa wanted. The Goddess of Health blinked her eyes open and let them adjust to the…

Candlelight?

They were in a room fashioned entirely out of dark stone. That was the only way Kavaa could describe it. She herself lay on her back in a fresh pair of clothes on a cold stone… well, she supposed it was a bed, but it was a cut-out into the wall. That explained why she had bumped her head when she tried to sit up, there was barely enough space to roll from one side to the other, sitting up was completely out of the question. Kavaa looked to the side and saw Neneria sitting by her side. The woman had a notebook in her hand, and she was sketching something. “Where are we?” Kavaa asked again. If Neneria was here, then that meant Kavaa was safe.

Well, anyone friendly would mean it was safe, but with Neneria, that made it exceptionally safe. “The Hold of Dineh.” Neneria replied flatly. Kavaa’s face must have said she couldn’t place it. “The most south-eastern hold in Erdely. If you’ve fought in the woods above, then you know where we are.”

Oh. That did place it. Kavaa remembered Fer would get arms for her warherds through these holds. “Oh yeah.” Kavaa replied. “So we made it out of Fazba?”

“You didn’t miss anything, I came in and captured Taneth’s soul.” Kavaa placed the name in her mind. It was one she hadn’t heard of in a long time… Back in the Great War. A dragon. Oh. Suddenly the images of the battle in Fazba came flooding back. Of Iniri getting overwhelmed. Of Kavaa’s power giving out. Of her legs starting to quiver and feel weak. Of darkness overtaking her mind and body. Of Kassandora holding her and of Kavaa holding onto Kassandora. She remembered the wood go up around them as Iniri drew more of the strength that Kavaa was giving out. She remembered how weak her hands got, how she couldn’t see by the end of the battle.

She remembered Iniri and Kassandora and she realised she was here and they weren’t. Kavaa sat up and bounced her forehead on the stone above her, then the back of her head bumped off the stone below. As much as that hurt though, Kavaa didn’t care. She had to ask. “And Kassie? And Ini? What about them?”

Neneria tilted her head as she looked to Kavaa. “They’re fine. I was wandering how long it would take you to ask that question.” Neneria made a tiny wry smile and wagged her finger at Kavaa. “One of the jaded Great War Divines you truly are, first thing you did when you woke up was inspected whether it was dangerous.”

Kavaa rolled her eyes at Neneria’s analysis. How the woman judged her was precisely the last thing on her mind right now. “Are they safe? They know I’m fine, right? That I just passed out, out of energy and that it’s not dangerous.” There had been a time, long ago, when Kavaa would be sure that Iniri could see the death of everyone she knew and loved die and not bat an eye. And that same idea had existed about Kassandora too. Kavaa didn’t even think that those conceptions were wrong, it was simply that both Goddesses had mellowed out. “They’re not worrying about me?”

“They’re worrying about you.” Neneria said flatly and Kavaa collapsed back down on the stone. Of course they were worrying about her. It was just like them to worry. Kavaa knew that before she even asked the question.

“You know you can say that they’re not. I already know they’re worrying about me.”

“Then why ask?” Neneria raised an eyebrow at Kavaa. The recovering Goddess’ vision finally settled as she placed everything in the room. It was true, they were in a classically dwarven accommodation of sorts. Maybe it was for Divines, actually, it had to be. Neneria was sitting on a grand throne of stone with that note book of hers on her knees and there were more spaces for lying down. All of those were the same as what Kavaa lay in, just those huge rectangular cut outs that looked more akin to a place where coffins would be slid into the wall rather than people. The Goddess herself was in the same black dress that she always wore, with the same collar of raven feathers. Deathly pale, with dark eyes, she stared at Kavaa and idly shaded something in with a pencil.

“Because I’m worried about them worrying about me.” Kavaa said dryly as she swung a leg out from her… what was it even? Bed? Laying place? Every strand of muscle in her leg and in her stomach felt as if it wanted to tear itself apart and cry.

“They’ll worry about you either way.” Neneria replied.

“You’re terrible.” Kavaa said and Neneria smiled as if that was some great compliment.

“I get that a lot.” Impossible. The Goddess of Death was simply impossible to strike a conversation with. That was all that Kavaa had to say on this, but she wouldn’t say it out loud. It wasn’t even because she was afraid of Neneria, at this point, the woman’s tremendous power wasn’t even so unsettling. It was simply that the woman would not change no matter what Kavaa had to say, so Kavaa would save her energies and simply say nothing. At the very least, if there was one person who would say things as they are, it would be Neneria.

“How worried are they about me?” Kavaa said. It honestly was slightly disappointing that Kassandora or Iniri weren’t here to watch over her. Kavaa knew why, Kassie had jobs to attend to most likely. Iniri did too. Neneria was only good for fighting so if they were in a friendly hold, there was nothing for the woman to be doing anyway.

Neneria obviously did not understand the question. “They’re worried.”

“I meant do they know I’ll make it or they panicking because they think I’m going to die or what?” Kavaa did not even bother to keep the rudeness out of her tone. It didn’t even look to bother Neneria one bit.

“They know you’re fine. Iniri gave you some medicinal plants. Kass sent human medics to check your blood and whatever else it is that doctors do. You were obviously going to survive.” Kavaa took a deep breath and sighed. So they weren’t dreading every waking moment then, that was good. Kavaa stared at Neneria as Neneria stared at Kavaa. She knew exactly why it was Neneria that was here and not Kassie or Iniri. But… She didn’t want the answer to that question.

“What are you drawing?” Kavaa asked. Neneria looked down at her piece of paper and then showed it off to Kavaa. A black and white pencil sketch of a portrait of the Goddess of Death, complete with dress and raven feathers she was currently shading in. It was fine work, if somehow terribly unexciting: a Divine a portrait of themselves was the sort of jokes mortals came up with to talk about Divine overindulgence. “You’re good.”

Neneria rolled her eyes. “Not bad I’ll accept. All of us can draw.” Could the woman not accept a compliment? Kavaa. And how terribly unoriginal of her. Couldn’t the woman just say something normal for once? Kavaa sat and looked at Neneria. Neneria smiled at Kavaa. Kavaa did not smile back. Neneria’s grin grew.

“What are you smiling at?” Kavaa tried to keep the bile out of her tone, she wasn’t she quite managed it.

“You want to ask what they’re doing instead of sitting here looking over you.” Neneria said it so smugly that she obviously had to be enjoying the way Kavaa’s face twisted. The Goddess of Health sighed eventually.

“Tell me.”

“Tell you what?” Neneria asked innocently. Kavaa wasn’t going to play any of these games with Neneria.

“Tell me what they’re doing and what’s going on.”

“We’re currently in Dineh.” Neneria said. “Granted, all the way from Fazba to Dineh it was impossible to separate Kassie and Iniri from your body, but now they’ve gone off. Kassie is talking to the Lords of Dineh, she introduced Iniri, now I assume Iniri is working to clear the collapsed tunnels to the surface holds in the Erdely mountains. There’s some Tartarian activity to clear up, but she’ll probably be able to handle it. In case she can’t, I’ll be called in, but for now I’m tasked with watching over you because Kassie doesn’t fully trust that the dwarves won’t just attack you since you were a White Pantheon Divine back then. Kassie, from her reports…” As Neneria droned on, Kavaa found her eyes glazing over. What the woman was saying was important no doubt, but it was simply hard to focus. The Goddess of Health wasn’t one for throwing away useful information, but she was sure she would get it from Kassie instead. And she wasn’t one for constantly needing to be in a happy mood all day either. Life was nothing to laugh about frankly.

But her mind got so filled with thoughts that she wanted to throw up to expel them. She could practically taste it: the bitter notes of disappointment.