The Dragon Queen and her mates.
Chapter 214: Getting closer

Chapter 214: Getting closer

She chuckled before turning to look at the pink glow of the setting sun before closing her eyes and breathing in the sea breeze, her anger calmed down a little. " If it makes you feel better, I don’t know how to be a good wife or a lover either. I have never felt the confidence to be with a man before, something always held me back... maybe it’s my insecurities but I couldn’t help but believe that no one would ever like me for who I am..." she paused and turned her head to look at Yakov before smiling mockingly as she said, " There was one time when I asked a man why he liked me and the only response he could give was that I was beautiful when I pressed him for more, he simply looked me dead in the eye and said, is there more than that, understandably I was quite with him and yet he didn’t understand why I was furious."

Yakov chuckled he wasn’t surprised that the man wasn’t able to see through her, she was far more secure and wrapped up in a protective layer, and even he as the chancellor of the empire was having a hard time understanding her, of course, no normal man would have been able to hold her down. " Is he the same man who made you feel like you were worthless?"

" I see that you are not going to let this go huh," she chuckled before she sighed and tilted her head slightly to the left as she looked at Yakov.

"It’s a con of being a chancellor your majesty," he replied with a soft smile on his face. " I can’t help but be hyper-focused about everything."

" I see since you are so hyper-focused I have no choice but to answer you, isn’t it?" She sighed as she pulled her shoulders back. " Yes, he was the one who called me too immature and naive, apparently he was quite upset when I refused him and when he saw that I was failing miserably, he thought it was fun to watch or maybe it was because I was really a fool who thought that I could do just about anything, believe me when I say that I sounded like an arrogant bitch."

" Please do not call yourself such degrading names your majesty, it makes me quite angry."

Bree gave him a mock gasp as she cupped her cheeks. " Really? Its angers you? That’s rich coming from a guy like you, I never thought that I would see the level-headed chancellor of the Empire get angry over something." Then she threw her head back as she exhaled loudly and said, " And here I thought that you all might be bitching me about me behind your back," she bumped her shoulder against his and chuckled, " You swear you didn’t call me ugly names behind my back when I was going all wild." Then she paused and quietly sniggered under her breath and said, " But then again maybe you all didn’t do that, you are too much of a gentleman for something like that but maybe if you have done that, then you wouldn’t have to do something as cruel as planning to kill me."

The corner of Yakov’s lips tugged up as he rolled his eyes and pushed her to sit uptightly. " I think I deserved that."

She paused and then sighed.

" No you didn’t," she said after a short silent battle with herself for a moment. " I have heard a lot about what I did to you all when I had my head stuck in the sand, I do not blame you all but..."

" We scare you," he finished for her helpfully and was rewarded with an unguarded smile. " That’s right, you all kind of scare me a lot, I fear that one day you all will seriously get me into trouble."

He did want to get in trouble with her but the trouble she was talking about was really different from the one that he was thinking about. " You don’t have to worry about that your majesty, there are a lot of things that I cannot promise you but there is one thing that I can assure you of—— and that’s, I will never hurt you."

" You won’t?" She looked at him as if she was trying to piece everything together. " Maybe you won’t hurt me but I can assure you that you will surely hate me one day, I might be good at pretending but the truth is that I have no idea what I am doing, I am really good at following someone’s lead but I cannot lead and there is nothing wrong with it but what if it’s limited to just that, what if they are right and I am wrong...what if Prince Leon would have been a better ruler than I can ever be?" She turned to look at him when she noticed the assessing gaze in his eyes, and she smiled. " But there is nothing I can do about it, and I know that you will one day see these huge fails of mine, in fact, if not for you I wouldn’t have been able to get this far. That’s the kind of woman I am, pretending to be strong but if you sit down and watch me take off my mask you will see that I am nothing but a ball of vulnerability, that’s what I am."

Yakov saw the flashes of insecurities in her eyes, he caught the chinks in the perfect facade of Brianna Dragniere and they rouse every single protective instinct of his. There was a time he has made her feel unsafe, maybe he might be half of the cause of her insecurities, he could almost imagine a frail woman walking on eggshells while trying to keep herself alive and now he wished he could have gone back in the past and punched himself in the guts. It was confusing as hell.

He watched her lower her head and dab her eyes and he felt his guts twist ever so slightly. He has been watching her cry like a creep for a while, now he should do something about it right? Maybe he should at least make an effort even if he knew he couldn’t do it, he awkwardly raised his arm and placed it around her shoulders, tucking her to his side.

" What do you like your majesty?" He asked in an attempt to distract her.

She raised her head and blinked her eyes as she looked at him closely and said, " You mean to ask what I like apart from staying alive?"

It was a good thing that her tone was teasing because his wolf let out a whimper at her jab. " And apart from throwing jabs at me."

Her lips twitched as she sighed and leaned her head on his shoulder without any reservation. " I like travelling, I have never travelled of course but I would like to leave everything that has been weighing on my mind without any worry about what is going to happen if I was to leave."

Yakov blinked his eyes and looked at Levy, that was something rather simple yet difficult. For someone, their status and power they could, of course, leave everything behind and just leave but the same could not be said for them, if they wanted to leave without a worry then it would be currently impossible given that they were without an heir.

" But I can’t do that can I?" Bree raised her head and looked at him with those sharp ambers that despite their intensity looked rather soft. " I can’t leave the responsibilities that I have taken behind and even when I want to put myself my priority, I can’t do that because there is something more important waiting for me, something bigger. "

He studied her carefully, he has pegged her as many things but now his views were changing slowly as he pulled her even closer and offered his comfort. " And how does that makes you feel?"

" Scary," she replied with an exhale. " But If I just drop everything and run away then it will make me feel like I have done something really shitty, even if everything that’s happening around me is not my fault, I am willing to lean to this scary path, at least I will learn something in my own way. If there is something that I know is to pick up my mess and clean it as if my life depends on it and picking someone’s slack."

Why was his hand circling behind her back? When did he start doing it? He wanted to stop himself but it felt too damn good for him to stop.

"It’s nothing to be ashamed of, if anything I can say that you are doing a fine job," he said with a gruff tone, he has never calmed a woman down much less a crying and hurt woman, who was on the verge of emotional havoc. " You are adjusting yourself to new things, trying to broaden your horizon, that’s something that I can never do."