Off Work, Then I Become a Magical Girl
Book 2: Chapter 17

Vol 2 Chapter 17

Bai Jingxuan once had a dream.

Back when her thoughts were still naïve and her family still whole, she dreamed of becoming a musical artist.

Though her childhood memories were a little blurry, Bai Jingxuan could vaguely recall owning a music box. It was a gift from her parents, she thought. Whenever she was in pain, the soft, gentle music from that box would lift her from her suffering.

Now, all she could remember were scattered fragments of melody, but it didn’t stop her from having a deep affection for music.

But then, her parents died in a Ravager attack, and Bai Jingxuan was sent to the Welfare Home. The music box disappeared amidst the chaos and never returned to her life.

The welfare home wasn’t bad, but it had no way of retrieving what she had lost. One of the caretakers even gave her a new one based on her description, but it just wasn’t the same. It no longer had the power to soothe her pain. Her dream, too, became a memory sealed away in dust.

Maybe it wasn’t just the dream. From a moment even she hadn’t noticed, Bai Jingxuan had lost all sense of desire.

She could no longer anchor herself to emotions like joy or anger, nor measure what was good or evil. She didn’t know why she was happy, or why she was sad. She could only watch others and follow the feelings they showed.

She was obedient, because there was nothing she wanted to resist.

She was quiet, because she had no needs of her own.

Like a doll with no will, mimicking the form of a human while hollow inside.

Some kids her age, in their childish cruelty, called her a “shell.” But even when called that, Bai Jingxuan remained oblivious.

Why was she an “empty shell”? She didn’t understand.

But it was true—she didn’t know what she wanted. Her desire was blank, her emotions blank.

Nothing gave her direction, nothing helped her find a sense of self.

She was like a ship lost at sea, surrounded by endless waters with no landmark to steer by. Except this ship was called “self,” and the sea around her was called “life.”

Did she want money? Fame? To become a doctor? A teacher?

She kept asking, observing the dreams of others. Then, she would borrow those dreams and try them on herself. Like a customer trying on outfits at a clothing store, uncertain of what to want, she aimed to try on every outfit until she found one that fit.

This confusion continued until a few months ago—until the Welfare Home was attacked and Moko appeared before her.

Could “Magical Girl” be the direction she had been looking for? The outfit that fit just right?

Could becoming a Magical Girl help her retrieve the emotions she’d forgotten, the desires she’d lost?

Bai Jingxuan didn’t know the answer.

But whenever she recalled the moment she was saved by Senior Sakura, she still felt a sense of longing and awe—gratitude, even. The emotions from that moment still felt so vivid now.

It made her feel, for the first time in a long time, what it was like to be alive.

—“So I told myself, I want to become a Magical Girl like Senior Sakura.”

Walking slowly along the streets of Lixing District, Bai Jingxuan murmured,

“At least, I was truly moved by what she did. I was thankful. Those emotions weren’t fake.”

“…I see.”

Tian Sheng, walking beside her, listened to her story with a serious expression.

“Even though I still can’t recall all the details… Back at the Welfare Home, that’s why you became a Magical Girl, right?”

“Mm.” Bai Jingxuan nodded.

It was morning, near the “Lakeside Spring” residential complex in Lixing District.

Three weeks after the Moon Festival incident, the Countermeasure Bureau approved Squad Three’s request to search residential areas for signs of Black Cinders Dawn.

On their way to Lakeside Spring, the squad ran into Bai Jingxuan, who was patrolling the area. And just like that, a new tail attached itself to their team.

Li Yingwei, the squad leader, had tried multiple times to dissuade her, but it didn’t work. The rest of the team had no idea how to reason with a Magical Girl, so the task eventually fell to Tian Sheng.

And now Tian Sheng was suffering.

Because he didn’t know how to talk to Bai Jingxuan either.

Back when he worked as a caregiver at the Welfare Home, he had known Bai Jingxuan, but as a male caretaker, he had never been assigned to care for the girls directly. So they weren’t exactly close.

He had simply liked her for being well-behaved and sensible, and would chat with her from time to time. But knowing that most children in her situation probably wouldn’t want to talk about the past, their conversations always stayed light, never touching anything too deep.

If Bai Jingxuan hadn’t taken the initiative to share her story, he still wouldn’t know what to say.

“But that senior you mentioned… she’s already… gone.”

He carefully chose his words, trying to avoid touching her wounds.

“Black Cinders Dawn is likely responsible. That’s why you hate them so much and want to go after them, right?”

“It’s not hate…”

Bai Jingxuan began seriously, but halfway through, seemed to remember something and lowered her eyes, correcting herself:

“I want to punish them.”

“You were going to say that word again, weren’t you?”

Tian Sheng scratched his head helplessly.

“I don’t get it—is that really how your ‘Senior Sakura’ would act?”

“No, that’s how Teacher acts.”

Bai Jingxuan clenched her fist.

“But Teacher was Senior Sakura’s teammate. She’s doing it for her. I think that’s totally right. That’s really cool!”

“Even if it might be wrong?”

“It has to be right, doesn’t it?” Bai Jingxuan tilted her head.

“…That’s what she said, Bureau Director.”

Sighing, Tian Sheng pulled a phone from his other pocket and pressed it to his ear.

“You heard all that, right? That’s her reason. I really can’t talk her out of it.”

After that, he fell silent, listening to the voice on the other end of the line and nodding now and then.

Then, he handed the phone to Bai Jingxuan, ignoring her wide-eyed, betrayed look—as if he had just ratted her out. Avoiding her gaze, he scratched his cheek and said:

“Xuan, the Director wants to speak with you.”

The fearless, long-winded Bai Jingxuan instantly deflated, looking like a grade-schooler caught doing something wrong. She took the phone hesitantly.

Then, casting another betrayed glance at Tian Sheng, she answered the call:

“Hello… Dad—Uncle.”