No Money to Cultivate Immortality? -
Chapter 9: Inviting a Deity
Stories of mortals who struck deals with evil gods, only to end up dead and damned, were bedtime warnings every child on the First Floor of Kunxu grew up hearing.
“Zhang Yu actually went to an evil god? Was he really that desperate?”
“No wonder I get a splitting headache whenever I try to remember that night. Is this some trick of the evil god?”
Zhang Yu instinctively sensed danger and tried to run. But just as he turned, his trembling body froze in place.
The original Zhang Yu had only turned to the evil god because he truly had no way out.
It was either spend a lifetime at the very bottom, breaking his back to repay a soul-devouring debt, or take a gamble with his life for one last shot at cultivating immortality.
“Evil god! My first wish is for you to grant me one hundred wishes!”
Zhang Yu swallowed hard and looked nervously at the thing across from him. “You can do that… right?”
“Heh. Something that simple? Of course I can.”
Seeing Zhang Yu’s hopeful smile, the ragdoll let out a sneering laugh. “But my choice is… not to.”“Because once the summoning ritual is complete, it's you who must grant me three wishes.”
“If you refuse, or delay, or screw up in any way, the backlash from the ritual will rip your flesh apart and scatter your soul into the void.”
“Now then—my first wish is for you to grant me one thousand wishes.”
Zhang Yu stood there stunned.
What the hell?! This whole summoning ritual was just so the evil god could make me grant it wishes? And not one, but a thousand?! Is that even allowed?
The ragdoll finished speaking and grinned. Its button eyes—cold and hollow—stared straight into Zhang Yu’s soul.
“Ready? I’m about to give my next wish.”
Zhang Yu’s gut clenched. “What is this freak planning now?”
If it really made him fulfill a thousand wishes, wouldn’t that make him its slave?
Or worse—what if it asked for something impossible? Wouldn’t that mean certain death?
The ragdoll spoke slowly, “I’ve decided. My next wish is… for you to collect a batch of antiques for me.”
Zhang Yu swallowed again. “Antiques?”
The ragdoll giggled. “Relax. I’ve already picked them out for you. Just buy everything in your shopping cart.”
Zhang Yu paused, then fished out his phone. Following the memory in his head, he opened his shopping cart—and almost passed out.
It was stuffed full of Buddha statues, offering tables, incense burners, wooden swords… Every item ran into the tens of thousands of yuan.
If he couldn’t afford them, he wouldn’t be able to fulfill the wish. And failing an evil god’s wish? That meant dying a horrible death from ritual backlash.
Panicked, Zhang Yu asked, “Could you… maybe wish for something else?”
“I probably can’t afford all this.”
“Excuses…” The ragdoll’s gaze sharpened, its pitch-black eyes leaking malicious intent. “Trying to weasel out already? If you can’t afford it, borrow. If you can’t borrow, sell your liver, your lungs, your kidneys. You'll find a way.”
Zhang Yu stared back seriously. “But if I do that, won’t I die just fulfilling this one wish?”
The ragdoll chuckled. “And?”
Zhang Yu said firmly, “Then you’ll lose someone who could’ve granted your thousand wishes.”
“Or… you can give me time. Let me join one of the Major Sects of the Immortal Dao. Then I can slowly grant your wishes—starting with those antiques.”
The ragdoll raised an eyebrow, surprised. “Go on.”
Zhang Yu continued, “I ran the numbers. Even if I worked odd jobs on the First Floor of Kunxu for decades, I still couldn’t afford those antiques.”
“But if I got into one of the Major Sects, I’d earn enough in just a few years.”
The ragdoll asked, “So?”
“So if I study hard, cultivate diligently, get into a top university, and graduate into a Major Sect, I can use the sect’s stipend to buy your antiques—and keep going from there.”
The ragdoll was quiet for a long moment. Then it said, “You’re saying… you want to study hard, get a job, earn a salary, and that’s how you plan to grant my wishes?”
“You’re playing me?”
A crushing wave of malice swept through the room. The ragdoll’s button eyes turned into devouring black holes, sucking in all the light.
Zhang Yu clenched his fists, trying to steady his shaking legs. He met the ragdoll’s eyes and spoke clearly:
“Your first wish was for me to grant you a thousand wishes. The second is to collect the antiques in my shopping cart.”
“If I die collecting the antiques, I’ll never finish the thousand wishes.”
“If I knowingly choose a suicidal path, that would count as deliberately sabotaging your first wish.”
“And if I sabotage the first wish, the ritual kills me before I even finish the second.”
“So right now, the only feasible plan I can think of is to study, pass the exams, find a job, and earn the money.”
Silence. Thick and heavy.
Then the ragdoll spoke.
“Show me your balance.”
Zhang Yu showed it. His bank account was a wasteland of zeros, filled with overdue loan notices and debt warnings.
The ragdoll said nothing for a long while.
This kid… The summoning ritual was supposed to pick wealthy candidates. For anyone else, those antiques would be a trivial expense.
But this one… this one’s so poor he broke the ritual logic. So poor he found a loophole.
Dammit! I said I wanted someone rich! Who sent me this broke-ass loser?!
After another long silence, the ragdoll finally looked at Zhang Yu and said, “You… kind of have a point.”
“Fine. Go study. When you’ve saved up enough, I’ll come find you.”
But it snickered again. “Just remember—all of this is to fulfill my wishes.”
“If you so much as slack off once… the ritual will kill you where you stand.”
As the ragdoll faded away, Zhang Yu exhaled hard and collapsed onto his bed.
Then, as if struck by lightning, he sat bolt upright.
“Wait—hold on! What did I even get out of this ritual?!”
He suspected that the ritual might be tied to how he crossed into this world… but he didn’t dare say it aloud.
Instead, he took a roundabout approach. No matter what, he resolved to take the secret of Earth to the grave.
The ragdoll’s voice echoed faintly in his ears, even though its presence was gone:
“You’ve been granted potential. But potential is different for everyone. What exactly yours is… you’ll have to discover for yourself.”
Outside, as it walked away, the ragdoll muttered to itself:
“This kid’s talent is trash. That so-called potential probably just boosted his mana or physical strength a little.”
“No way he’s getting into any top university, let alone a Major Sect. How’s he supposed to fulfill my wishes?”
“But still… that little maneuver was kind of amusing. Let’s see how far he can crawl.”
Back in the room, Zhang Yu stared at the dark Symbol in his palm as it slowly began to change.
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