Matchmaker Mayhem
Chapter 21: Mei’s Secret Experiment

Chapter 21: Mei’s Secret Experiment

Ava had dealt with plenty of crises in her matchmaking career: runaway brides, jilted grooms, and one particularly disastrous date involving a pet iguana. But this? This was new.

She stared at the empty chair across the consultation desk, her pulse rising. "She’s not answering her phone," Ava muttered, jabbing at her screen again.

Kelly peeked her head into the office. "Still no sign of Mei?"

"Nope," Ava said, pacing the small room. "She was supposed to meet Mr. and Mrs. Patel ten minutes ago to discuss their son’s matchmaking profile. They’re expecting her, not me. How do I explain this?"

Kelly tapped her chin. "Tell them Mei’s... deep in research? Meditating on their son’s romantic destiny?"

Ava shot her a glare. "Not helpful."

Kelly shrugged. "You’re the matchmaker. Be charming."

Before Ava could respond, a sharp knock echoed through the office, followed by Mr. and Mrs. Patel stepping into the room. They were impeccably dressed, with the air of people who expected results—and quickly.

"Ah, Ms. Lee," Mrs. Patel said, eyeing Ava with polite suspicion. "Where is Mei? She promised us a consultation."

Ava plastered on a professional smile, scrambling for an excuse. "Mei... is currently tied up with another client. Very high-priority."

Mrs. Patel raised an eyebrow. "More important than our son?"

"No, no, of course not," Ava said quickly. "I’ll be handling your consultation today. Mei and I work closely together, so you’re in good hands."

Mr. Patel frowned, clearly unimpressed. "We specifically requested Mei because she understands the balance between tradition and modern compatibility. Does she consult you on the lunar calendar?"

"The... what?" Ava blinked.

"The lunar calendar!" Mrs. Patel exclaimed, looking mildly offended. "It’s crucial to ensuring that the couple’s fates align. Surely Mei has trained you in this?"

Ava froze. "Of course she has," she lied, her brain scrambling.

Mr. Patel crossed his arms. "Then tell us: Is a Rooster compatible with a Rabbit in the Year of the Dragon?"

Ava’s mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. She glanced at Kelly, who had retreated behind the door, leaving Ava to fend for herself.

"Let’s, uh, pull up the data!" Ava said, grabbing a tablet from her desk and typing furiously. "Just give me one moment."

—

Ava sat across from Mr. and Mrs. Patel, trying to exude calm professionalism as her insides churned. The couple stared at her expectantly, their expressions a mixture of polite doubt and mounting impatience.

"So," Mrs. Patel began, folding her hands primly, "you were just about to explain the Rooster and Rabbit compatibility in the Year of the Dragon."

"Right! Yes," Ava said brightly, her fingers flying across the tablet screen as she searched desperately for something to say that sounded legitimate. She silently cursed the universe for her grandmother’s cryptic "spiritual emergency" and for not warning her that matchmaking involved the zodiac equivalent of rocket science.

Ava cleared her throat. "Well, according to... recent compatibility findings, the Rooster and Rabbit can experience a dynamic pairing that brings... challenges, yes, but also tremendous growth!"

Mrs. Patel squinted. "Tremendous growth? That sounds ominous."

Ava laughed nervously. "No, no! By growth, I mean personal development. Like a beautiful plant—um, a relationship plant—that starts small but blossoms with the proper care and attention."

Mr. Patel raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Are you comparing my son’s future marriage to gardening?"

"Not just any gardening!" Ava said, panic bubbling beneath her smile. "Careful, curated gardening! Like those really expensive bonsai trees."

There was an awkward silence as the Patels exchanged glances. Ava’s smile froze in place.

"I see," Mrs. Patel said coolly. "And this careful... ’bonsai relationship’—what does the lunar calendar say?"

Ava’s brain stalled again. She grabbed the first thing she found on Google, trying to sound like an expert. "Ah, yes, the lunar calendar says that... opposites attract! While the Rabbit brings peace and sensitivity to the relationship, the Rooster adds passion, ambition, and a little spice."

Mrs. Patel tilted her head. "Spice?"

Ava nodded too vigorously. "Yes! Who doesn’t want spice? Spice is essential for longevity."

"Too much spice gives indigestion," Mr. Patel muttered.

Kelly, peeking into the room from the hallway, shot Ava two thumbs up, clearly entertained by the trainwreck unfolding. Ava shot her a death glare.

---

The Wrong File

Ava decided she needed to regain control—fast. "Let’s take a look at your son’s profile," she said, reaching for the nearest folder on her desk. "We’ll discuss his preferences and find someone truly compatible with his values."

She opened the folder with flourish, only to freeze.

It wasn’t the Patel family’s son’s profile. It was a client file from earlier in the week—a woman who had specified her future husband must own a pet chinchilla and enjoy competitive underwater basket weaving.

Mr. Patel frowned as he peered over her shoulder. "Our son... likes chinchillas?"

Ava slammed the folder shut, her smile tight. "Wrong file! Ha! My mistake. Totally unrelated. Let me just..." She shoved the folder aside and grabbed another one, her movements frantic.

"Do you know what you’re doing?" Mr. Patel asked suspiciously.

"Absolutely," Ava lied, flipping open the correct folder this time. "Ah, here we go. Your son—engineer, loves hiking, looking for someone grounded but adventurous. Excellent starting point!"

Mrs. Patel didn’t look convinced, but she nodded. "And the lunar calendar?"

Ava’s eye twitched. "It’s... still consulting the stars."

—

Ava was halfway through explaining the finer points of matchmaking to the Patels when her phone buzzed on the desk. She ignored it at first—after all, nothing could be more important than convincing a skeptical mother and father that their son would one day find love—but the buzzing didn’t stop.

It vibrated again. Then again. And again, like an angry bumblebee trapped in a jar.

"Is that your phone?" Mr. Patel asked, frowning disapprovingly.

Ava forced a smile and shoved her phone under a pile of folders. "Nope. Probably the building next door. Old wiring, you know how it is."

Mrs. Patel tilted her head suspiciously. "It sounds like a text. Maybe it’s Mei?"

Ava froze, panic flashing across her face. "Mei? Uh, no, Mei’s... busy. Very busy. Consulting the, uh, spiritual matchmaking forces as we speak!"

The phone buzzed again, this time louder than ever. Mrs. Patel’s eyes narrowed.

With a sigh of defeat, Ava grabbed the phone and glanced at the screen. It was a text from Mei: "Spiritual emergency. Had to leave. You handle Patels. Trust your gut. Or flip a coin. Either works. xoxo."

Ava’s eye twitched. "Excuse me for one moment," she said, plastering on a polite smile and stepping out of the room.

---

Outside the consultation room, Ava paced furiously, typing a rapid-fire text back to Mei.

Ava: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN SPIRITUAL EMERGENCY?!"

Mei: "Exactly what it sounds like, dear. Very important. Can’t talk."

Ava: "You left me with the Patels! They’re asking about lunar calendars and fate charts! I don’t even know what year the Rooster is supposed to marry the Rabbit!"

Mei: "Relax. Google it. Gotta go. xoxo."

Ava groaned, gripping her phone like it was a stress ball. If she didn’t track down Mei soon, she was going to combust.

Ava’s fists clenched. She looked up at the Patels, forcing her most professional tone.

"I need to briefly step out and consult Mei on a... critical compatibility update."

Mr. Patel sighed. "This is highly unprofessional."

"Very unprofessional," Mrs. Patel echoed, pursing her lips.

Ava ignored them and grabbed her coat. "I promise we’ll finalize everything shortly! Please enjoy some tea." She rushed into the hallway, dragging Kelly along by her elbow.

"You’re abandoning ship?" Kelly whispered, struggling to keep up.

"I’m leaving to save this ship before it sinks," Ava shot back. "If anyone asks, tell them I’ve been summoned by the spiritual matchmaker gods."

"Got it," Kelly replied, stifling laughter. "Godspeed."

---

Chaos at the Café

By the time Ava stormed into the café on Elm and 7th, her patience had officially expired. She scanned the room, zeroing in on Mei, who sat serenely in the corner, sipping tea and scribbling notes into a leather-bound notebook like she was working on the next great romantic manifesto.

But before Ava could unleash her frustration, a splash drew her attention.

At the next table over, the café’s flustered barista stood frozen, coffee dripping down his apron. Across from him, a bewildered woman in a floral dress stared at Mei, who was now pointing triumphantly between them.

"Congratulations!" Mei declared. "You’re a match!"

The woman gaped. "What? I don’t even know him!"

The barista stammered, "I—I just asked if she wanted oat milk!"

"Exactly," Mei said, nodding sagely. "Shared oat milk preferences? A solid foundation for love."

Ava rushed forward, mortified. "Grandma, what are you doing?!"

The barista stumbled back, directly into a passing server holding an overloaded tray of iced lattes and pastries. The server yelped as the tray tilted, sending coffee and whipped cream soaring through the air in slow motion.

SPLOOSH.

The barista stood there, drenched from head to toe in iced caramel lattes and bits of blueberry scone. The café fell silent except for the sound of someone’s suppressed laughter. (It was probably Kelly, recording from a distance.)

Mei winced. "Timing may have been slightly off."

---

Ava grabbed a stack of napkins and thrust them at the soaked barista. "I’m so sorry. She’s... uh... very enthusiastic about love."

The barista wiped his face, muttering something about "needing a new job" as he stumbled away toward the back room.

Ava turned to Mei, hands on her hips. "Spiritual emergency, huh?"

"It was!" Mei said cheerfully. "The universe guided me here. I sensed romantic potential."

"Romantic potential? You just turned that poor man into a human latte!"

"Love is messy," Mei said, shrugging.

Ava groaned, sinking into the chair across from Mei. "You can’t keep disappearing like this! The Patels practically ran me out of the office."

"And yet, you survived," Mei said, her tone warm. "That’s the point, Ava. You’re stronger than you think."

Ava stared at her, torn between wanting to throttle her and hug her. "You drive me crazy, you know that?"

"Of course," Mei replied, sipping her tea. "That’s what grandmothers are for."

---

As they left the café, Ava noticed a couple sitting on a nearby bench, sharing a quiet laugh. Mei paused, her eyes lighting up.

"I bet they’re a match," Mei said.

"No," Ava replied firmly, grabbing her grandmother’s arm. "Let’s leave one couple alone today, okay?"

Mei chuckled, letting Ava drag her along. "Fine. But you owe me snacks for saving your confidence."

"Snacks?!" Ava sputtered. "You owe me for saving your reputation!"

Mei patted Ava’s arm, looking entirely unbothered. "Details, dear. Details."

As they walked off, Ava shook her head, torn between exasperation and a reluctant smile. Life with Mei was chaos, but maybe—just maybe—she was learning to embrace it.