I Woke Up Piloting the Strongest Starship, so I Became a Space Mercenary
Chapter 555 「Oooon… Why!?」

「You know, for a Platinum Ranker, you’re actually—well, relatively—pretty level-headed… but could you maybe stop doing things on such a ridiculous scale?」

「If I could, I’d be living a much quieter life.」

A few more days had passed since everyone got their dresses fitted. I’d finished my own fitting too, and with some time to kill before Chris arrived, I decided to swing by the mercenary guild. Nothing had changed there. The place still had that faux-Western vibe with wood-patterned materials for that ‘rustic’ feel. The tavern attached to it was the cherry on top—definitely a space that catered more to someone’s personal taste than anything professional.

「So… that lady over there… she wouldn’t happen to be the one everyone’s talking about?」

The man who said this—none other than the branch chief of the Grakkius Secundus Colony Mercenary Guild—gestured subtly with his pinky finger.

「Yeah, that’s her. The ex-military one.」

「Ahh, makes sense. No wonder.」

His gaze drifted over to Serena, who was checking out the guild interior alongside Mimi and the others. She wasn’t wearing her usual white military uniform or elegant civilian clothes, but something more in line with mercenary fashion. Even so, the sword at her hip made it obvious she was nobility. Then again, the same could be said about me.

「You probably aren’t here to look for a job, right? Not with everything you’ve got on your plate right now. Don’t tell me you came to gawk at the guild?」

「Yep, you’re mostly right. I mean, she’s former Imperial Space Navy, sure, but also an aristocratic officer. Knows her way around noble society and the military, but anything outside of that? Totally clueless. So I’ve been dragging her around to broaden her horizons.」

「Totally clueless, huh? That’s a hell of a way to talk about a noblewoman…」

「I am a noble too, technically. And she’s my fiancée, y’know?」

Besides, we were talking in hushed tones, heads practically touching over the counter. No way even Serena’s enhanced hearing can pick us up over the guild’s usual racket. This place is always bustling.

「I warned you, don’t come to me crying later. So, alright, you came to show her the guild, fine. But that really all there is to it?」

「That’s the gist of it, yeah. Thing is, we got locked down in a secure room the moment we arrived at the colony. I haven’t had a chance to get a clear read on anything going on. You guys gather intel on me through the guild, right? Mind giving me an update?」

「You’re the one at the center of it, aren’t you?」

「Yeah, and yet I’ve been completely cut off. I don’t know squat. Someone’s definitely pulling strings.」

The guild chief gave me a look like I was some poor creature to be pitied. Hey! What’s with that look? Don’t do that. That’s never a good sign.

「You should’ve been able to look it up yourself. Don’t tell me they confiscated your terminal?」

「Of course not. I tried plenty of times. But anything related to my marriage and House Holz, House Dareinwald, and House Willrose just came up blank.」

I’m not an idiot. Of course I tried digging into it—using my personal terminal, Krishna’s systems, even Black Lotus’ console. But no matter how deep I searched, not a single bit of info related to the wedding turned up. Even Mei gave me that rare apologetic look and said, ‘I’m very sorry, Master. It appears some kind of information manipulation and blockade is in effect.’ If even she couldn’t get past it, that means this is serious.

「Here you go. It’s being reported everywhere. About your wedding.」

「You’re kidding. Let me see—eh!?」

He handed me a tablet. The headline made my stomach drop.

‘Unprecedented Three-House Joint Wedding Between the Dareinwald Earldom, the Holz Marquisate, and the Willrose Viscounty to Be Held in the Imperial Castle. His Majesty the Emperor Expected to Attend.’

「This has gotta be a joke.」

「They’ve put this much info out already. There’s no backing out now. Just accept it.」

「Oooon… Why…!?」

There’s no way this isn’t that Fucking Emperor’s doing. No doubt he’s sticking his nose in for the fun of it. Or maybe Marquis Holz pulled some political stunt and dragged him into it.

But seriously, what’s the thought process here? Sure, there’s some benefit in bringing me under the Empire’s wing… but I’m still just a mercenary. No way the Empire truly understands my power and what ‘visitors’ are. Isn’t this all way too overblown?

「So what, the Empire’s intel division—or worse, Mechanical Intelligences acting on Imperial orders—were the ones enforcing the info blockade? That’s going too far.」

「You’ve got a reputation for bailing when pushed around. Heard you say it yourself—‘If things go south, I’ll just run.’ Even I know that, so the higher-ups definitely do.」

「So this whole thing’s a ‘you’re not getting away this time’ deal? Why the hell is the Empire going all in on me? I’m just a no-name merc with a shiny badge.」

「A ‘no-name merc’ doesn’t charge into crystalline lifeform swarms and earn the Silver Sword Wing Assault Medal and a Gold Star. A ‘no-name merc’ doesn’t land three noblewomen—an heiress to an Earldom, a marquis’ daughter and former colonel, and a viscount’s daughter who’s still an active mercenary. A ‘no-name merc’ doesn’t get treated like royalty by the Elves on their homeworld, or invited to the nearly-closed-off Holy Vuelzarus Empire as a state guest. And a ‘no-name merc’ sure as hell doesn’t singlehandedly take down an earl’s house suspected of ties to space pirates.」

「Okay okay, I get it! Can you not just list all my sins like that? And I didn’t take down the Ixamal house on my own, okay!? I just happened to kill the heir and most of their private army!」

「Normal mercs don’t go toe-to-toe with a full contingent of noble bodyguards and rack up a triple-digit kill count unaided.」

The guild chief stared me down with calm, unblinking eyes, reciting my resume like a grim prophecy. I pleaded with him to stop, but the man was having none of it.

「The wedding’s in five days, right? Dareinwald’s young lady should be arriving soon too, I reckon.」

「This is literally the first time I’m hearing that date. Pity me.」

「What’s there to pity about a guy landing a bunch of cute, beautiful brides? Be a man and suck it up.」

「I have sucked it up—but if His Majesty’s gonna be there, I can’t help but get cold feet.」

「That part, I actually do sympathize with.」

With a shrug, the guild chief offered what little comfort he could. It helps… a bit? Maybe? Eh, probably not. I have a really bad feeling about this whole thing. I can only pray that Fucking Emperor doesn’t start some nonsense on the big day.