I (30), Who Works for a Black Company and Died While Regretting My Gloomy Life, Started Over From High School!
Chapter 140: Swaying on a Packed Train in a World with Smartphones

The time is early morning.

After a long time, I shaved and washed my face, going through the almost forgotten routine of getting ready for work.

I put on a shirt, wore slacks, fastened my belt, and tied a necktie.

Looking at myself, unmistakably dressed like a salaryman, I let out a sigh as if reluctantly acknowledging that I had become an adult again.

However… compared to when I was thirty and facing the end, my body at twenty-five is in impeccable shape.

(No gray hair or hair loss… Even my internals, which had various problems nearing the end, seem to be in decent condition now.)

During this period, I was so desperate to fulfill my role as a working adult, and I held baseless dreams that if I could overcome this hardship, happiness would await.

Little did I know that the result of working like a horse would lead to my mother’s sudden death, estrangement from my sister, and ultimately my own demise at the hands of the company.

(Now… let’s go. To the everyday life of this time when I am twenty-five.)

As I open the front door of my apartment on the third floor, I am greeted by the chilly morning breeze and gentle sunlight.

It’s a scene of the morning commute that I’ve seen thousands of times, but…

(Haha… Seeing pedestrians with smartphones makes it feel like I’ve returned to the future…)

In the second iteration of the world—when I was in high school—there were fewer people walking down the street tinkering with their phones since flip phones were the norm.

Just that alone made everyone seem earnest.

But now, those who don’t let go of their smartphones while walking down the street are the unmistakable proof that the times have leaped forward.

For better or worse, there is an abundance of content for solitary living, making it an era where real-life connections have faded.

(First… I have to go to that place where I was killed. Whatever I do, I have to start from there.)

Descending the stairs of the apartment and becoming a part of the people on the street, I stepped into this world.

The first-world where I worked like a drone—five years before the world where I died at the age of thirty.

What I hold in my heart is a mission I must fulfill at the risk of my entire existence.

What I envision in my mind is the smile of the girl I cherish to a maddening degree.

Armed with just that, I walk down a path full of uncertainties.

The crowded train was filled with salarymen heading to work.

Everyone in the packed train car looked as gloomy as pressed sushi, and the only thing filling the air was the weariness of tired adults.

The cityscape outside the train, not far from my hometown, was vastly different from the era when I was sixteen.

(Yeah, the scenery is completely different… There are many new buildings that didn’t exist in the time when I was sixteen, and a considerable number of small shops have changed too…)

On the city street television that I glimpsed, they were reporting on the effects of last year’s increase in the consumption tax to eight percent, as well as the expansion of radical armed groups in the Middle East. It truly felt like a different era.

(Haha… This vivid morning at twenty-five makes me want to cry…)

The middle-aged man standing next to me reeks of cigarettes, and the strong perfume of the lady diagonally in front stings my nose.

Compared to that sparkling world when I was sixteen, I’m unavoidably aware that I’ve returned to being an adult.

(But well, even though it feels like I was just a high school student until yesterday, now I’m in a suit on a packed train. Moving so easily between the past and the future, my head might really start to spin…)

The thought crosses my mind whether I’m in reality or a dream, and if perhaps my very existence is nothing but a lie.

The only thing that was real was the worst death I faced at thirty, and the youth I relived by time leaping back to high school, now at twenty-five, amid the scene of my commute, is all of it perhaps nothing more than a long dream—

(No, that can’t be… No way…)

In the midst of this situation that could drive someone insane with a second time leap, I strongly denied it.

In that second world, I was able to reunite with my lively mother who was alive and well.

I could now exchange laughter with Kanako, which ended in passing last time.

And, I spent vivid days with Haruka, who smiled like a sunflower.

All of that golden everyday life was radiant, and I trembled with joy, tears streaming down my face, at its brilliance.

(I didn’t know about something like that. Something like that didn’t exist in my life. Those days that shone so brilliantly like the sun… couldn’t have been born from my shoddy fantasies.)

Because I never knew the radiance of life, I can assert that it was vividly real.

That’s why, I will protect those beautiful days, like a cluster of stars.

By doing what needs to be done in this era.

(Get a grip, me… Even though everything is full of assumptions and there’s no certainty in anything… still, it’s not like there’s no assurance at all.)

That was the thin thread of logic supporting my heart.

(Time leaps must want me to do something…)

First, I time leaped from thirty to my high school days, and then a high school Haruka time leaped into the adult Haruka. Explaining this away as mere coincidence is quite a stretch.

What’s decisive is that the time leap, tantamount to a god’s miracle, happened at my one prayer. Granting my wish, it perfectly sent me to this era—meaning there’s an existence observing my existence.

From this, I can infer—

(… The activation of time leaps isn’t random; it’s driven by someone’s will or some kind of law. If so, every time travel must have a purpose, and there should be some role for me.)

I don’t know what that role is.

If every time leap is intentional, I can’t fathom what the orchestrator, be it a god or an extraterrestrial, wants.

(Whether they gave me a second life or intentionally brought destruction to Haruka, and even answered my wish to save her… it’s really unclear what they want.)

But, if I’m just stating the current situation, I’m being pushed from the spacetime.

Even though I’m scheming an incredible time alteration.

(At best, there’s only this bit as reassurance… But my mission remains unchanged. I will run through this era until I save Haruka…!)

Well, anyway—first, I need to secure a foothold.

First and foremost, I need to settle the score with the salaryman who killed me.

So, I’m heading.

To hell for me.

To that place I thought I’d never set foot in again.