Conquering His Cold Heart
Chapter 443 - 443: Unattainable Wishes

Caspian's gut-wrenching wails resonated across the Kilerth Castle, making everyone who heard the cries feel a shred of the agonizing pain that he was going through.

Everyone began to wonder if something terrible had befallen the King or the Kingdom for Caspian to react in such an extreme manner.

Surely enough, the whole castle was in a state of turmoil and panic.

Many of the higher-ranking soldiers began to rush towards the King's chamber to get to the depth of the situation and help the King in any way they could.

The King's Guards as well as the Queen's Guards, on the other hand, were the only ones who somewhat understood the situation.

They had overheard a few sensitive matters.

Thus, they had come to the conclusion that the monarchs needed to be left alone at the moment so that they could sort out their feelings.

So, they were trying their best to contain the chaos that was ensuing outside and were trying to keep everyone away from the King's chamber.

Inside the bathroom, Caspian was still desperately wrapping his arms around Anastasia and crying. He was unwilling to loosen his grip on her as if he would somehow be able to keep her away from the clutches of death if he just kept on holding onto her with the sheer force of will.

"Please don't say that you are going to… cease existing. How can you leave me here alone, Anna? I can't imagine the world without you. You are my world now. Don't say that you are…"

Caspian buried his face into the hollow of Anastasia's neck and began hiccupping while bawling his eyes out.

Anastasia had initially taken Caspian in her embrace thinking that she could at least provide some level of comfort to him before he got engulfed by his dark side completely.

The warm and loving touch of hers was indeed able to bring back the emotions in his hollow, predatory eyes.

However, now that Caspian had laid his vulnerable side bare before Anastasia, she could no longer put on a brave face. Her eyes welled up with tears for the umpteenth time tonight as she held her heartbroken husband in her arms.

"You are my world too, Caspian…" Anastasia replied with a trembling breath so as to provide some solace to his burning heart.

She began to pat softly on his back and then continued to whisper out her heavy words, "If I had a choice, do you think that I would want to leave you alone and deliberately make you suffer? No! If I had a choice then I would want to live for a very long time, preferably as long as you."

Caspian clutched Anastasia's gown and grimaced in pain because although he hadn't yet accepted the ugly reality, he had understood that his wife didn't have that luxury to choose.

Anastasia tried to swallow the lump in her throat and continued to express her inner desires, "I wish to see our dreams about the future coming into realization. I wish to raise a few kids with you. I wish to live a long and happy life with you, Caspian."

She tightly closed her eyes and hugged Caspian tighter when she whispered under her breath, "You have no idea how much I long for it every day."

Her warm tears rolled down her face and landed on Caspian's freezing shoulder.

Caspian flinched a little as those tears felt like the scorching midday sunrays on his skin. He could tell that not just he, Anastasia was hurting a lot too. And all that he could do right now was to press his cold lips against her neck.

He wished to console her too. However, what could he possibly say to comfort her? It was not like he could make empty promises to her.

Before he could decide what to say, Anastasia continued lamenting about her terrible fate.

"At first, I wanted to live for a bit longer for the sake of my parents. Maybe a small part of me wanted to live for myself too. But after meeting you, the greatest love I could ever wish for, I want to live for you… I want to live for us. But sadly… there are no djinns in the world who could possibly fulfill my wish."

Her voice trembled again when she mumbled, "Caspian, I know it is hard but you have to accept–"

"Don't you dare complete that sentence!" Caspian abruptly lifted his head and said rather angrily. "I don't want to hear it again and again! I've heard it enough already for hell's sake!" He helplessly drooped his shoulders as he said that.

Anastasia's will to live for a long time and her desire for a happy future together only added salt to his injury.

Anastasia drew in a deep breath as she looked deep into her husband's eyes. Those beautiful blood-red eyes of his were full of agony.

And although Caspian had begged her not to complete her sentence, she did it anyway. If she was breaking him anyway, she wanted to do it all at once rather than breaking his heart little by little, day by day.

"But you have to accept what's already been written. My fate has already been sealed."

"NO!" Caspian burst in rage. He grabbed her shoulders and shouted while shaking her, "I said don't say it!"

He was behaving as if the more Anastasia said that she was going to die, it would come true sooner.

Caspian abruptly turned around and went to submerge himself in that filthy bathtub again. He wanted to cool his head before he lashed out at his wife and hurt her even more.

And the more seconds he spent under the icy-cold water, the more he began to regret his earlier actions.

'How could I be so cruel to her?' He clenched his fists underwater and screamed at himself in his head, 'What if you actually did something to her in the fit of your rage? And why would you even exhibit this heinous side of yours to her?'

Caspian's tears mixed with the water when he recalled his wife's warm embrace. 'Even after seeing this monstrous side of yours, she dared to take you in her arms. Don't you dare ruin her remaining… her remaining days…'

"Caspian!"

He came back to his senses when he suddenly got pulled above the surface of the water by his wife.

Anastasia was crying again. She got worried when Caspian didn't come out of the water for a long time.

"What were you trying to do?" She punched him on his arm and reprimanded him for his action. "Don't act stupidly!"

A feeble smile appeared on Caspian's face when he saw his wife worried about him even in this situation. He gulped hard in order to restrain himself from breaking down again.

Then after heaving a deep sigh, he said with a serious expression on his face, "I will prepare a carriage for you in the morning. You should go back to Orsenia."

Anastasia felt a sharp stinging pain in her heart when Caspian suddenly brought that up out of nowhere.

She wiped her tears and asked anxiously, "Go back to Orsenia? Why? Why would you say that?"

"Will you go if I say that I am extremely mad at you and that I don't even want to see your face?" Caspian questioned her back in a low growling voice.

His heart was racing, so much so that he could feel his chest thumping. He was afraid after asking that question to her because he wasn't being honest. He just said that so that Anastasia would agree to go back to her homeland.

Anastasia felt a series of sharp pangs in her chest. However, she knew that she deserved his hatred.

So, she asked in a weak voice, "How long do you want me to stay there?"