Broken Bond: Between Vices and Virtues (BL)
Chapter 277 - 35: Finally

Chapter 277: Chapter 35: Finally

Athan stood still on the landing, his chest rising and falling unevenly. His face was blotched and damp, his hands twitching at his sides as if uncertain whether to defend himself or reach out.

Shawn stared at him in disbelief, heart thudding painfully. The tears had rattled him. Athan never cried. He was always collected, always proud. But now, seeing him like this, undone and fragile, something bloomed in Shawn’s chest. Hope. Dread. And confusion.

"...Why were you crying?" Shawn asked at last, his voice quieter than the silence around them, nearly drowned by the drumming of their hearts.

Athan looked away. He wiped his face first, then he replied, "Forget it. You shouldn’t have seen that. I’m sorry for showing you such an unsightly view."

Shawn frowned. "That’s not an answer."

"I said forget it," Athan replied, firmer and colder. He was trying to save what remains of his dignity. "Go back inside, Shawn. You don’t have to see me like this."

He was heartbroken already, and now, he was embarrassed by his unmanliness. He picked up the bin and the bouquet, then turned away from Shawn to leave.

But before he could take another step, Shawn’s hand darted out and grabbed his wrist. "Don’t do that."

Athan froze.

"Don’t just walk away again," Shawn pleaded. He bit his lower lip, his eyes lowered a bit, but he made sure his voice was louder this time. Louder and more honest. "I know it might sound ridiculous, but... after I saw you break down like that, I hoped..." His voice caught. "I hoped it was because of me. That you were hurting because of me."

Athan didn’t speak. His eyes darted away again, lips pressed tightly. Saying that was selfish and asking why he cried was inconsiderate. How was he supposed to answer that when he couldn’t even utter a single word of how painful it was, hearing and seeing Shawn reject and disregard his flowers symbolizing his feelings?

"I was going to throw those flowers away," Shawn said, his grip tightening. "Not because I hated them. But because I couldn’t stand the scent. That honey-sweet scent..." He trailed off, his breath hitching as he looked Athan up and down. He stiffened after noticing Athan’s expression. "Why do you cry? Why do you look like you were in pain when I said that? Why, Athan?"

Athan’s shoulders hunched, shrinking under the weight of the moment. His eyes were sadder, but there was a hint of embarrassment in them. Shawn couldn’t understand what that was for.

"It’s... nothing," Athan mumbled. He tried to pull his arm back, but Shawn did not let go.

"No, tell me," Shawn insisted, stepping closer and turning Athan’s body to face him. "Whose pheromones are that scent from? Your apartment was filled with it. And these flowers—"

"It’s mine."

Athan’s voice was barely audible. His eyes flitted up, then dropped again.

"It’s me. That scent’s mine."

Shawn’s mouth parted slightly, stunned. "What?"

"I’m sorry," Athan said, his voice low, ashamed. "I know it’s not... how an alpha’s pheromones are supposed to smell. It’s embarrassing."

Shawn blinked, visibly shaken. "You’re ashamed of your scent?"

Athan gave a bitter laugh, short and quiet. "You know what other alphas smell like. Musk. Wood. Something sharp. Mine’s... like honey. People say it’s sweet, cloying. Feminine." He glanced up briefly. "It’s not something I’m proud of."

Shawn’s brows furrowed deeply, eyes clouding with something between grief and disbelief. "Then... why didn’t you ever let me know before? You never showered me with your pheromones. Not once."

Athan winced. He bitterly smiled and muttered, "Because you’re not mine."

Shawn recoiled. He was rendered speechless. Those words were the truth that pierced his heart once again.

Athan drew in a shaky breath and finally met his gaze. "That’s something alphas only do for their omegas. To mark, to claim, to protect. You were never mine, Shawn. You were free. I didn’t want to be selfish and cover you in a scent you never asked for. I didn’t want to cross that line, not when... not when we didn’t even know what we were."

Shawn stood still, trembling. The air was too thick. His chest ached. All this time, all his pain, his anxiety, his heartache, were caused by a simple misunderstanding.

He felt like the earth had shifted beneath him. All those times he thought Athan was indifferent—detached—it was restraint. All those days, he longed for some confirmation. Athan was holding himself back, believing he had no right to offer it.

And all this time, Shawn had been breathing him in, unknowingly absorbing his pain and affection, buried inside that deceptively sweet scent.

He didn’t know what to say. He palmed his forehead and stared disbelievingly at the floor. How could he be so stupid? No, how could they be!

Slowly, the fog of misunderstanding began to lift.

"...I thought," Shawn whispered, voice breaking, "I thought it belonged to someone else. That woman with you. I thought she picked the flowers. That she was the one you found, the one you really wanted to marry after you broke our engagement."

"What...?" Athan asked, astonished. "What the hell are you saying, Shawn? I severed that forced arrangement because I wanted us to start anew! I wanted to come clean!" His hand raised and then lowered, hovered around Shawn, then finally grabbed his shoulders and shook him lightly, as if forcing Shawn to look at him, to listen properly.

"In the first place, I was the one who wanted it. I knew my parents would find someone to marry me once I got older, so I made a promise. I told them you’re my fated mate. That it’s you whom I wanted to marry. No one else."

Athan’s head slumped on Shawn’s shoulder. He carried that promise and lie all these years. All because he wanted them to end up together. He was the selfish one, the bad one for tying Shawn to him, so how dare he beg Shawn to love him back?

Athan shook his head after recalling what Shawn said again. "Who is this woman you talk about?"

Shawn, astounded from everything he heard, pursed his lips and replied, "I saw you with her outside your apartment building."

Athan thought for a minute, then after he realized the timing, he recognized who Shawn was talking about.

"God, Shawn, she’s my cousin! My mother’s niece. She visited from England, and Mom asked me to help her find a place to stay because she was thinking of settling here. We were just checking a unit in the same building where we live."

Athan lifted his head and cupped Shawn’s face, his hands trembling a bit. "Do you understand?"

"I did," Shawn said, eyes misting. "And I misunderstood. Many things. I’m sorry. I didn’t want to throw your flowers. I just thought it’d help me move on because you already did."

Shawn’s voice finally broke. He cried quietly. Athan wiped his tears away, ever so gently, and dedicated.

"From you?" Athan scoffed lightly, brokenly. "How could I? I might have never known how to love if not because of you."

Shawn’s sobs became louder. His eyes were filled with tears, but relieved and happiness was there.

Athan bumped their foreheads gently. He was certain now, even if he hadn’t heard the words he badly wanted to hear from Shawn. His tears, his emotions, were enough to solidify his belief. Shawn likes him back. And he couldn’t be any happier than he was right now.

"Fated or not. Even if it was a lie. You’re the only one for me. I’ve loved you ever since we were young, Shawn Williams. There was no one else but you."

Shawn nodded his head repeatedly. "M–Me too..." His voice kept shaking, and he couldn’t calm himself down. He held Athan’s hands that cupped his face as he inhaled deeply. Then, he made sure to look at those hazel eyes with sincerity. "Me too, Athan. I love you, too."

A smile, albeit with quivering lips, formed in Athan’s face, filled with ecstasy, with genuine devotion, and contentment. He gazed at Shawn lovingly, his eyes asking, longing. Shawn did not answer; he tilted his head forward, bringing his lips closer to his alpha.

Without further ado, the two kissed passionately, laying down all their emotions underneath that union, and savoring that moment achieved after layers of misunderstanding and suffering.

After they separated to catch their breath, there was a long pause. Neither moved.

Then, Shawn’s voice cracked softly. A trace of smile and regret in his words, "Then why... why did we hurt each other so much?"

Athan chuckled softly as he pulled Shawn to his embrace. "...Because we both thought we weren’t allowed to want each other," he answered.

And just like that, the final shard fell into place.

Shawn exhaled, firmly this time, yet he was still stunned and overwhelmed. His hand wrapped around Athan’s body, but now he felt the warmth there differently—no longer like something slipping away and uncertain, but something tethered and real.

He found his love. His alpha. His Athan.