A Mate To Three Alpha Heirs
Chapter 59: Nervous

Chapter 59: Nervous

{Elira}

~**^**~

I woke up with a tight knot sitting heavy in my chest.

The morning air in the room felt colder than usual, or maybe it was just me.

Today was Thursday.

And that meant, in just a few hours, I’d be sitting in Power Channelling practical class — the course that Cambria had talked about.

My fingers curled around the blanket.

What if it really turned out that I had nothing — no gift, no spark?

What if, when the professor scanned us, I’d stand out not because I was special, but because I was empty?

I swallowed, my throat dry.

Trying to calm my nerves, I reached inward, searching for her — my wolf.

But all I felt was the familiar, unsettling emptiness.

She had only spoken to me twice since the Mating Moon Ceremony... and now, it felt like I was calling into a silent cave.

Maybe my wolf was weak. Or perhaps it was me.

I thought about confiding in the brothers.

Lennon’s easy warmth, Rennon’s calm steadiness... even Zenon’s cold, blunt honesty.

However, the idea dissolved before it could take hold. I didn’t want to bother them with my fears.

I didn’t want to be a burden to them, not with all their kindness.

A sudden jerk startled me.

Nari, breathing hard, glared across the semi-dark room.

"Why in the goddess’ name are you sitting there like that, hair all over your face? Trying to scare someone to death?"

I blinked. "I—"

But she cut me off, words sharp. "What are you? A ghost? Or do you just enjoy creeping people out first thing in the morning?"

"I’m sorry," I murmured, dropping my gaze to my lap.

Juniper’s sleepy voice came from across the room as she padded to the switch. The lights flicked on, soft yellow spilling over us.

"It’s your fault for getting scared so easily," she told Nari dryly.

Nari huffed and turned away, muttering under her breath.

I let out a small breath and pushed myself up, crossing to my wardrobe. My hands moved on autopilot as I pulled out my uniform, then gathered my toiletries and towel.

The cold water on my face didn’t do much to settle my nerves.

By the time I returned, the room was already alive with rustling fabric and quiet conversation.

I packed my bag quietly: notebook, timetable, meal ticket, pens, and student ID.

Cambria, already dressed and fixing her hair, glanced over. "Ready?" she asked.

I nodded, forcing a small smile.

Together with Cambria and Tamryn, we left the room, the door clicking shut behind us.

---

The cafeteria smelled faintly of warm bread and tea.

I didn’t feel hungry at all — my stomach felt tight, heavy.

Still, I picked up a tray and added a banana, a plain sandwich, and a glass of sweetened soy milk.

As we walked to an empty table, Cambria’s gaze moved over my tray. "That’s all?" she asked, a faint crease appearing between her brows.

"I don’t really have an appetite," I admitted, voice small.

"Are you okay?" she pressed gently.

I shook my head, then quickly corrected, "I mean, yes. I’m fine." Even though I wasn’t.

Nari and Juniper arrived moments later, trays heavier than mine.

Nari dropped into her chair, starting to chat with Tamryn about last night’s study hall.

I forced myself to take one small bite of my sandwich, the bread tasting like paper on my tongue.

Halfway through my glass of soy milk, I couldn’t manage another sip.

My heart wouldn’t stop its uneasy beating, my thoughts drifting again and again to the practical class in the afternoon.

I was on the verge of throwing up, and I didn’t think that was a good idea.

--

After breakfast, the five of us walked together, our shoes tapping lightly against the stone path toward the main academic building.

At the entrance, we split up — each moving toward our locker.

At mine, I unlocked the door and carefully swapped my heavy backpack for my notebook, textbook, phone and pen.

The metal door clicked shut behind me as I stepped away.

Inside the corridor, I kept my head down, ignoring the faint whispers and side glances.

It had almost become normal now — the weird looks, the hushed curiosity.

Today, though, my mind barely registered them. All I could think of was the afternoon class.

Plus, I needed to pee, so I dashed for the female restroom to relieve myself.

--

I stepped into my classroom, which smelled faintly of fresh paper and lemon cleaner, in time for my first class of the day: Agriculture & Pack Sustainability.

Keeping my gaze straight, I walked to my desk and sat down, setting my notebook and pen neatly in front of me.

When the professor walked in, his voice steady and calm, I tried to keep my focus. But my thoughts kept slipping, drifting to the ache of uncertainty inside me.

Every few minutes, I’d realize I hadn’t written down a single word, and force my hand to move again.

The lesson blurred: something about rotational crop strategies, pack food reserves, and sustainable herb cultivation.

I did my best to listen, to jot down the main points, but it felt like writing through water.

The real weight in my chest refused to lift.

And all I could do was hope that by afternoon... somehow, everything wouldn’t fall apart, especially my heart.

As soon as class was over, I dashed to the restroom for another bathroom break, ignoring the two girls openly whispering about me while they washed their hands.

I was in no mood for lunch today, but I still had to join my roommates to avoid questions later on. Plus, I needed to be in the right place at the right time to avoid unnecessary attention.

"Still not hungry?" Cambria asked, worry laced in her tone.

"No," I replied, staring at the small ceramic bowl of sweet oats pudding sitting in front of me.

Even the aroma felt like an assault to my nose and my mind. But I had to endure it.

I couldn’t even keep water down my throat.