Rabbit Must Die
Chapter 82: Shouldn’t... Die from the Fall_1

Chapter 82: Chapter 82: Shouldn’t... Die from the Fall_1

Qin Shou said with a solemn face, "What do you understand? Any immortal can fly normally! Today, I’m going to show you something thrilling!"

"What’s thrilling?" Chang’e asked.

Qin Shou casually answered, "Flying, everyone can do it, but how about crashing? Can they do that?"

Chang’e: "Uhh... you’re not actually out of control, are you?"

"What else? I’m about to vomit already..." Qin Shou complained bitterly.

"Be careful, fly higher!" Seeing the auspicious cloud plunging straight down, Chang’e screamed.

With a look of suffering, Qin Shou said, "I’m trying to make it fly higher... but I can’t pull it up! We’re crashing... watch out..."

In the sky, a white cloud traced a beautiful arc, spinning in the air, drawing one circle after another as it plummeted toward the Moon.

Whoosh...

Bang!

A burst of dust scattered in all directions...

"Did something fall down?" Wu Gang shaded his eyes with his hand and looked at the sky, "Hmm, it’s that damn rabbit. Probably dead. If it’s dead, we’re having roasted rabbit today. Huh... it didn’t die? Really tough hide. Oh well..."

"Ow... my back..." Chang’e groaned, clutching her waist and wincing in pain.

After complaining, Chang’e felt her lower back and her perky buttocks, and said in surprise, "Hey... Yu’er, that wasn’t Ride the Cloud, Drive the Mist! That was high altitude suicide! I fell from such a height, and it doesn’t hurt that much! How strange! Huh? Yu’er? Where are you? Are you okay? Don’t scare me!"

"If you don’t get up soon, I really will be in trouble... let me catch my breath." A voice came from underneath her butt, causing Chang’e’s pretty face to turn red as she hurriedly stood up and looked down. She saw a rabbit looking like a giant thumbtack, head stuck in the ground, chubby butt sticking out, while its little short legs and tail were still twitching.

Immediately, Chang’e’s pretty face blushed like a red apple, no wonder it didn’t hurt, such a meaty cushion, it would be strange if it did hurt...

"Give me a hand! Pull me out..." Qin Shou struggled to kick his little short legs, but to no avail; his legs were too fat, too short, and he couldn’t reach the ground to exert any force...

Watching this scene, Chang’e couldn’t help but laugh without any image, "Haha... Yu’er, you should lose weight, you’re too fat... Haha... and your butt is still wiggling..."

Qin Shou: "You’re the one to talk, your butt is not any slimmer than mine. Don’t believe me? Weigh it, and I bet you’d find yours has more meat."

Qin Shou wasn’t just talking nonsense this time; though his head was stuck in the ground, he still had his senses. With Chang’e sitting on his rump, he could naturally feel it... If the setting was different, he wouldn’t mind feeling it a bit more. But for now...

Chang’e gave Qin Shou a cold look. How big could Qin Shou possibly be? No matter how fat, it was a known quantity.

Chang’e grabbed Qin Shou’s little tail and yanked hard...

"Ow..." Qin Shou made an odd noise, sounding feeble.

"What’s wrong?" Chang’e asked with concern.

Qin Shou’s face flushed as he shook his head, "Nothing... just a bit exhilarating..."

Qin Shou had long discovered that his little tail was extremely sensitive; one touch and he’d feel all tingly. Now that he had been grabbed again, the sensation was profound...

But he couldn’t tell Chang’e that. He just noted to himself to make sure his tail wasn’t grabbed in the future; it was too stimulating...

"All right, enough fooling around, let’s go home. I feel so much lighter... I’m going to sleep beautifully!" Chang’e stretched lazily, showing off her slim waist. Qin Shou’s eyes lit up, thinking to himself: What a great figure...

"Are you going to sleep?" Chang’e asked.

Qin Shou thought about it and reasoned that even if he went back, he would sleep separately and wouldn’t gain any advantage, so he decided to shake his head and said, "I won’t go back just yet. I’ll practice this Ride the Cloud, Drive the Mist magic, it’ll make our trips out more convenient in the future."

Chang’e yawned and said, "Whatever you want, I’m leaving first."

After speaking, Chang’e waved her hand and entered the cave.

Qin Shou took a deep breath, formed a seal with his hand, and bellowed, "Ride the Cloud, Drive the Mist!"

The next moment, clouds formed under his feet, but they only lifted Qin Shou less than half a meter before going "poof" and dispersing, causing Qin Shou to fall flat on the ground.

"Hey! I could fly before, why am I even struggling to lift off this time? I don’t believe this!" Qin Shou, determined, tried to use his magic again, this time without yelling, to avoid the embarrassment of failing after such a proclamation.

As the magic circulated, an auspicious cloud appeared once more beneath Qin Shou’s feet, and he muttered nervously, "Come on, lift me up, keep me up, keep me up, geez... Cao!"

The auspicious cloud suddenly surged forward, but one of Qin Shou’s feet got stuck in it, so his wish came true—he was dragged along by the cloud...

Qin Shou yelled, "Stop! I said lift, not drag..."

Bam!

The auspicious cloud took a sharp turn, and Qin Shou crashed into a tree.

"I..."

Bam!

"Stop..."

Bam! Bam! Bam...

"Stop! Don’t run! Hold on... Ouch, hey! Hey! Hey! Stop it, there’s a mountain ahead!"

Bam!

The auspicious cloud shattered, leaving a rabbit with its head wedged in a crevice of a stone, its rear facing outward, motionless for a long while...

"Finally, it’s over... damn auspicious cloud..." Qin Shou grumbled as he pulled his head out, recalling a joke from his past life: Buddha, I beg you to press him under Five Elements Mountain for five hundred years with his butt sticking out, heh heh...

Thinking of this, Qin Shou subconsciously tightened his buttocks and shivered, muttering, "Lucky for me that dry stick Wu Gang isn’t here... Damn, wasn’t Ride the Cloud, Drive the Mist supposed to be easy to learn? Why is it so hard for me... Could it be that damn dog gave me a faulty cultivation technique?"

Meanwhile, at Guan Estuary.

"Achoo!" Dog Xiaotian sneezed and, rubbing his nose, muttered, "Who’s cursing me?"

After saying that, Dog Xiaotian squinted at the sky, enjoying the fresh air, muttering, "Ah... this feels wonderful, these clouds are so... clouds... Holy Cao... crap crap crap! I totally forgot, the Ride the Cloud, Drive the Mist I taught the rabbit was a load of bull I made up from the original. He better not mess around..."

Suddenly Dog Xiaotian jumped up, did three spins in place, and then lay back down again, muttering, "That rabbit’s got thick skin and tough flesh, it probably won’t die from a fall... um, a scourge lives a thousand years, definitely can’t die. Ah... but a thousand years doesn’t seem that long either... Good luck to you."

Back on the moon, Qin Shou, not losing heart, attempted Ride the Cloud, Drive the Mist again and managed to fly steadily, getting higher and higher...

"Haha... I’m nothing short of a genius, I’ve picked it up in no time, haha... so cool, accelerating!" Qin Shou shouted, only for the cloud to "poof" and disappear, followed by a rabbit screaming as it plummeted downwards.

Bam!

Soon after, the rabbit was stepping on clouds again, ascending shakily, then whoosh... Bam!

PS: Cao, what on earth did you all do last night? Over seventy comments saying, looking at these comments this morning took me ages...