It's Your Turn To Cry and Beg, Dear Uncle
Chapter 31: Feelings That Can’t Be Suppressed

Chapter 31: Feelings That Can’t Be Suppressed

The man’s black car sped through the highway under the dead silence of the night. It was 03:00 AM marking the start of the witching hour. A thick layer of darkness had long descended upon the city, leaving only the street lights to guide the night owls and those who were lost. Soon, he pulled the brake at the red light.

James stared blankly at the glaring color piercing his eyes. Though blinding, the man seemed unaffected, lost in thought as he waited for the countdown to end. His mind kept drifting back to the incident at the hospital just moments ago.

He should have scolded Kyra, made her realize her mistakes. But instead, she had effortlessly silenced him.

"Will we keep hurting each other? That depends on your next decision," Kyra had said firmly.

Her tone left no room for compromise. However, what tore his heart was the way she had looked at him when he chose to walk away without saying a word. The sense of emotions in her blue eyes slowly seeped away and hopelessness dyed her gaze.

"Why is it so hard for you to admit that you hold affection for me?" Kyra had once again cornered him with such suffocating questions, ones that slowly eroded his reasoning and morals, adding fuel to the embers of desire that had begun to spark.

At that moment, all he wanted was to walk away from Kyra. He couldn’t bear to keep listening to her and maintain his composure at the same time. But Kyra wouldn’t let him off so easily, and her words continued to haunt him during the drive.

"I’m not asking you to give that feeling a name. I just want you to acknowledge it!" Kyra had exclaimed with her voice that slowly rose in defiance. Though she lay on the hospital bed, her movements restricted by the bandages on her body, and though her eyes glistened with frustration, she didn’t look weak or pitiable in the slightest. Her aura was fierce, gripping at James’ heart.

"Admit that I matter—not just as a niece you take care of like a doll, but as a whole woman."

"You think these wounds hurt? What hurts even more is what you’ve done to me. That’s why I want you to admit it. Admit that you have feelings and refuse to face them because you’re a coward!"

Her voice had trembled slightly, and her eyes were already red, but Kyra didn’t shed a single tear. She confronted James looking calm and steadfast.

James tightened his grip on the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. Not long after, just as the light turned green, James let out a frustrated scream. He pounded the steering wheel, overwhelmed by rage. His breathing grew erratic, and every nerve in his body tensed up.

In the end, the traffic light turned red again, and the countdown restarted. Even so, he remained in the same spot, not moving an inch, stranded alone in the darkness of the night.

He rubbed his face in helplessness. His thoughts were a tangled mess with his heart and logic refusing to cooperate.

His initial reaction to reject Kyra derived from his instincts as a man far older than her and as someone who had always been Kyra’s guardian. As her senior, he held a heavy responsibility over her.

But now, the little girl he had raised was asking him to lead her down the wrong path. How could he possibly do that?

Admit that I matter, she had said. James wanted to laugh. Didn’t Kyra know? She meant more to him than anything. If she didn’t, he wouldn’t have kept the original copy of that footage so carefully.

Perhaps to Kyra, the wounds on her body were insignificant, but every single one of them carved a pain just as deep into his heart. So deep that he couldn’t hold back the urge to beg her to stop, and let him be the one to dirty his hands and help her exact her revenge.

Admit that I matter—not just as a niece you take care of like a doll, but as a whole woman.

Who was he fooling? Before he even realized it, his heart had already started beating for Kyra. He couldn’t possibly lust over Kyra if he truly saw her as his niece. Even if he was crazy, he wasn’t depraved.

He had tried again and again to hold on to his sanity, but Kyra kept testing him. His dark thoughts nearly consumed his rationality, tempting him to give in to his desires.

James chuckled bitterly, mocking himself. "Maybe you’re right. Maybe, at first, I rejected you for your own good. But somewhere along the way, it all turned into nothing more than an excuse."

When he had begun to open his eyes, he realized that his actions had been fatal, and what Kyra wanted wasn’t just a confession of his feelings.

By admitting the pounding of his heart, he would have to face the fact that he had hurt the girl he cherished most. He had destroyed her with his own hands, just as he was responsible for why Kyra was now lying in that hospital bed.

How was he supposed to fix this? Where should he even begin?

With his emotions in turmoil, James released the handbrake and floored the accelerator. His car sped through the streets at a dangerous pace.

****

Wisteria Mansion, 3.42 AM.

It didn’t take long before James reached home. The security guards on the night shift immediately greeted him. Just as James’ car stopped in front of the mansion, Mr. Roman opened the main door. The old man still looked orderly in his uniform. He stepped forward and greeted his young master.

"Why aren’t you resting, Uncle?" James asked in a hoarse voice. His appearance was a mess and his hair disheveled, yet it somehow made him look even more captivating, exuding a strong irresistible aura.

"I’ve had enough rest, Young Master. And by the looks of it, it seems you’re the one in need of sleep," replied the head butler as he helped James remove his coat. Then, he glanced at James hesitantly.

James who had walked past him immediately stopped. He turned around and saw the butler staring at him in silence. James raised an eyebrow.

"What is it, Uncle?"

The butler sighed. Even though the old master had forbidden him, he felt compelled to inform James out of loyalty.

Perhaps in the past, he would have obeyed completely, but after years of looking after James, and then choosing to serve the young heir of the Synders family, he felt a deeper sympathy for him.

Especially since this involved Kyra, whom he cared for and loved like his own granddaughter. Witnessing the discord between them recently, Mr. Roman had felt uneasy. He didn’t want to worsen the existing conflict between them.

"Young Master, as you know, the old master and lady didn’t return and decide to stay here because of Miss Kyra’s condition," Mr. Roman began. James nodded, signaling him to continue.

"Earlier, after the old lady had fallen asleep, the old master called me to your study. He then asked me about everything that had been happening. Since Miss Kyra’s visits have become rare, he no longer hears stories about you and her in detail..."

The butler hesitated further, but James patiently urged him

"And then?"

"Then, he started asking about Miss Kyra and Lila, as well as your relationship with Miss Lila." Roman immediately looked apologetic and bowed deeply. "I apologize, Young Master. In the end, I disclosed everything to him."

James pursed his lips, his brow furrowing with concern. He understood that Roman must have felt torn between him and his grandfather, who had been his previous master.

He didn’t blame Roman, who was simply doing his duty, and besides, his grandfather wasn’t an outsider. But that didn’t mean everything was fine.

James was fully aware of Roman’s responsibilities. As the second-in-command within the Synders mansion, Roman’s job wasn’t just about managing the household. He also needed to stay informed about anything concerning the Synders family to protect its reputation.

Therefore, James knew Roman was well aware of what was happening. He also knew the issues with the dismissed staff not long ago. Even though James remained silent and seemed indifferent, he was actually aware of everything going on in the mansion.

James massaged his temples. He could already predict what would happen next. He knew his grandfather well. Creighton was just as stubborn as he was and firmly upheld moral integrity.

Even though he didn’t know the contents of Kyra’s novel, there were too many strange points in this situation. The first question would be why James allowed Lila to frame Kyra with plagiarising. The second would be why James hadn’t immediately defended Kyra, whom he deeply cared for.

If James were to answer these questions one by one, they would eventually lead to the core issue, and the truth would come out. Creighton’s involvement was the last thing James wanted.

"Once again, I apologize, Young Master." Roman bowed again.

"It’s fine. I understand your position," James replied resignedly. He waved his hand, signaling Roman to stop bowing. "Thank you for warning me in advance. I’ll handle this tomorrow morning."

With that, James turned toward the entrance. But Roman suddenly stiffened. "Uh, Young Master! The old master--"

Before Roman could finish, James had already opened the door. As a result, James was immediately met with the sight of his grandfather sitting comfortably on the living room sofa, his sharp gaze pierced right through him.

"G-Grandfather..."

All of the sudden, Butler Roman had the urge to facepalm himself. Meanwhile, Creighton had already opened his mouth, welcoming his grandson in a displeased tone.

"You’re finally home."

James sighed. "Yes. But I’ll be returning to the hospital later this morning."

Creighton nodded before gesturing for him to come closer. "Come here. We need to talk."

James pursed his lips as he walked inside. Once he stood in front of his grandfather, he asked with a forced smile, "Does it have to be now? It’s still very early, you should be resting.

Creighton snorted before replying angrily, "How can I rest when many things are in utter mess?! You’re the one who’s keeping me up, so you’re the one who must take responsibility!"

"Now," the old man pointed at James. "You’ve probably been warned by Roman, so let’s skip the small talk. Explain yourself."

James pinched the bridge of his nose. "What do you want to ask?"

As the question left his lips, the atmosphere in the living room grew tense. Creighton’s expression turned serious, his gaze dark and foreboding. James’ heart sank at the sight of his grandfather’s change in demeanor. A sudden sense of foreboding washed over him.

"What’s going on between you and Kyra?"

Thud, went his heart.