Beneath the Surface: Secrets of an Obsessed Heart
Chapter 44 - 43

Chapter 44: Chapter 43

"R-Raiden," Hiro called out. He wanted Raiden to stop. It was becoming more than a kiss and he wasn’t sure he liked it.

But Raiden only seemed to hear Hiro moan out his name. It spurned him on as he bit and licked Hiro’s neck, leaving marks in his wake.

"Ah- it hurts," Hiro whimpered, trying to move but he couldn’t. "Raiden, it hurts."

His cries fell on deaf ears for Raiden was extremely stimulated. He couldn’t believe it. The person he had loved and coveted for years was right under him, moaning his name, accepting his kisses, his touches.

It was something he never believed would ever happen. He had never once in his life thought he would one day have Hiro. He used to think Hiro was unattainable but here they were. He had to take him before he could change his mind. He had to make Hiro his fully so that Hiro could not leave anymore. So that Hiro could not reject him anymore.

He released Hiro’s nipples and went low. He grabbed Hiro’s pants and pulled, yanking them down to his knees.

"R-Raiden!" Hiro exclaimed. "What are you doing?!"

It didn’t seem like Raiden could hear him though. He was only focused on his goal. He raised Hiro’s legs, placing them above his shoulder, enjoying the view of Hiro’s fat butt.

Everywhere else seemed to be thin but Hiro’s ass had persevered. It hadn’t decreased but increased instead. He splayed his palm on the smooth surface, gently rubbing. All that was left now was for them to connect. To be one.

"Raiden!" Hiro shouted with all his might and Raiden paused.

His eyes met Hiro’s teary eyes and he quickly came back to his senses. He gazed at Hiro’s disheveled form. Tousled hair, red swollen lips, bite marks around his neck, his shirt raised, exposing his abdomen and pants pulled to the knees.

Fuck. What had he done?

He recoiled in shock, hastily rising to his feet and creating a noticeable distance from Hiro, not daring to look at him. The mere thought of witnessing potential disgust in Hiro’s eyes compelled him to avoid direct contact. He couldn’t bear the idea of shattering the delicate connection between them.

"I’m sorry," he whispered apologetically before swiftly exiting the room.

********

Completely mortified about breaking his promise to Hiro, Raiden stormed out of the hospital. He swiftly entered his vehicle, his frustration evident in the forceful slam of the car door which was parked in the VIP parking lot.

"Where to, sir?" Han, ever dutiful driver, inquired.

"Keep driving until I tell you to stop." Raiden instructed, his hand reaching for the button at the back of the driver’s seat. With a subtle mechanism, the black soundproof glass ascended, cocooning him in a shield of privacy that he sought.

Han, accustomed to such moments, didn’t dwell on it and began driving. After all, this routine wasn’t unfamiliar in Raiden’s repertoire. There was a time that Raiden made him drive until they ran out of fuel and were stranded in a remote area of Japan.

Raiden closed his eyes and leaned back in his seat, panting. He couldn’t believe what he had done. What happened to being patient? What happened to being gentle? What happened to taking things slow?

One kiss.

Just one kiss was enough for him to toss his sanity out the window. It was enough for him to destroy the little trust he had made Hiro began developing for him. Just one kiss and he turned into someone else.

He covered his face with his palms in shame. How could he face Hiro again? He must have scared him shitless. That was why he couldn’t look at his face. He couldn’t bear to see the hurt and disappointment in Hiro’s eyes and worst of all, fear.

He despised seeing fear in Hiro’s eyes. Especially one that was directed at him. He’d rather even see Hiro cry. At least, he could comfort him but fear? He couldn’t even look at Hiro because of it. It made him feel disgusted with himself.

He covered his head with his suit jacket, shrouding himself in darkness. There was a time, a long time ago when Hiro didn’t fear him. When Hiro wanted to be his friend. He could remember it like it was just yesterday for it was the first time they met.

Flashback....

Raiden, at the age of 9, found himself longing for love amid the emptiness of his family’s absence. His father and stepmother, along with his step-siblings, had embarked on a holiday abroad, leaving him alone in their vast mansion but he welcomed the solitude, for it was an escape from the torment he would endure if he had joined them.

In his family’s presence, he faced relentless ridicule and insults, subjected to physical abuse and starvation by his stepmother.

The mansion, populated only by maids, became a haven for Raiden—a semblance of freedom.

However, one evening, he decided to go for a walk in the park. Just to get some fresh air. Seated on a swing, he observed families and friends, an outsider to the warmth and camaraderie he craved. Witnessing siblings playing, mothers caring for babies, and friends enjoying each other’s company intensified his desire for the love and companionship absent from his troubled home.

He wondered why their lives was full of happiness and love while his was not. He wondered why their parents loved them while his didn’t. What made him so different, so unlovable from other kids?

His mother died during childbirth but his father hated him and blamed him for her death. It baffled him how he had done nothing to his stepmother but she treated him like trash. As if he didn’t have a right to live or even exist. As if he wasn’t human.

For hours, he sat there and watched, observed as people came and left, all wearing smiles, wondering when he would be able to smile like them. Wondering when he would feel loved like them. Wondering when his father would look upon him with a smile on his face, when his stepmother would feed him with her hands like she did her kids and when his step-siblings would hug him and treat him with respect.

He wondered when he’ll be treated as a human by those he called his family.